NOTICE OF REVOCATION OF INDEPENDENCE
POSTED BY: embers
UPDATED: Sunday, January 16, 2005 21:52
VIEWED: 11624
PAGE 3 of 6
Sorry, but most of our bad reality TV shows are copies of BBC shows. You guys are the reason good shows like Firefly, Angel, and Wonderfalls ended up cancelled and replaced with Nanny 911!
You are the weakest link! Goodbye!
Point 3 Quote: "You should learn to distinguish the English and Australian accents." Sorry, I've never confused Mel Gibson's accent for John Cleese's!
Point 4 Quote: "Hollywood will be required occasionally to cast English actors as the good guys." HELLO! You ever watch an episode of Buffy or Angel? Wesley and Giles ARE the good guys!
Point 6 Quote: "The 2.15% of you who are aware that there is a world outside your borders may have noticed that no one else plays "American" football." Ever hear of NFL Europe? More American's actually play Soccer than British do! It's the number one amatuer and pro/am sport in the country!!! Don't even mess with Baseball! Outside of Europe, it's the fastest growing sport in the world. In Asia, and Central and South American countries, it's practically a national sport. Baseball is FAR better than Rounders or Cricket!
Point 7 Quote: "You will no longer be allowed to own or carry guns." Good luck on that one! You could try to collect the millions of unregistered guns from those of us who legally own them, but my bet is, it will get very bloody! Check your history books about 200 years back for reference, and LEARN from it!
Point 9 Quote: "All American cars are hereby banned. They are crap and it is for your own good." That's funny, considering that Ford now owns your best auto manufacturers, IE; Jaguar, Aston Martin, and Rover. The German's own the rest, Bentley (VW), Mini and Rolls Royce (BMW). It's also interesting that JD Power now scores Cadillac above Audi, BMW, and Mercedes in quality and owner satisfaction. Motor Trend's top 3 finalists in this year's Car Of The Year, were all American cars (the Corvette, the new Mustang GT, and Chrysler's Hemi powered 300C), none of the European entries made it into the top 5!
Point 10 Quote: "You will learn to make real chips." We do know how to make chips! We put them in a bag and call them Ruffles!
Point 11 Quote: "As a sign of penance 5 grams of sea salt per cup will be added to all tea made within the Commonwealth of Massachusetts, this quantity to be doubled for tea made within the city of Boston itself." That's okay, no one in Boston drinks tea. Coffee is the preferred beverage, which is why there's a Starbucks on every freakin' corner!
Point 14 Quote: "You will learn to resolve personal issues without using guns, lawyers or therapists." You may call them something else, but you have them too (except the guns, which is why the whole REVOCATION OF INDEPENDENCE stuff will never happen anyway!).
Point 15 Quote: "Please tell us who killed JFK. It's been driving us crazy." We could tell you, but then we'd just have to kill you too! We'll give you a hint; It's all Marilyn's fault!
Point 16 Quote: "Tax collectors from Her Majesty's Government will be with you shortly to ensure the acquisition of all revenues due (backdated to 1776)." I think were even, considering we saved your collective asses in WWII. In fact, you owe us, and we expect full payment at the end of the this fiscal year!
Last time I checked, we still have all of ther best military toys (hell, it takes a fleet of your tiny little aircraft carriers, to do what one of our super carriers can do). So good luck with the whole REVOCATION OF INDEPENDENCE thing. BTW: That flock of birds you just picked up on radar off the coast, is actually a squadron of F-22 Raptors heading for London! 
I'd given some thought to movin' off the edge -- not an ideal location -- thinkin' a place in the middle.
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Quote:
Originally posted by MacBaker:
Point 3 Quote: "You should learn to distinguish the English and Australian accents." Sorry, I've never confused Mel Gibson's accent for John Cleese's!
1) < sarcasm >And clearly because you can make the distinction, others won't as well < /sarcasm >
See comment 2.
Quote:
Originally posted by MacBaker:
Point 4 Quote: "Hollywood will be required occasionally to cast English actors as the good guys." HELLO! You ever watch an episode of Buffy or Angel? Wesley and Giles ARE the good guys!
2) I'm not sure that you are aware of the quote "There is an exception to every rule." ie You can't quote one case as a counter example and expect the rule to go away. This isn't math, it's society.
Quote:
Originally posted by MacBaker:
Point 6 Quote: "The 2.15% of you who are aware that there is a world outside your borders may have noticed that no one else plays "American" football." Ever hear of NFL Europe? More American's actually play Soccer than British do! It's the number one amatuer and pro/am sport in the country!!! Don't even mess with Baseball! Outside of Europe, it's the fastest growing sport in the world. In Asia, and Central and South American countries, it's practically a national sport. Baseball is FAR better than Rounders or Cricket!
3) But what percentage plays which sports in what countries. That is what matters. That is what tells you how big a deal it is. You can't say more play in the US and that proves something, because as you see below the US has... more people.
UK: Population: 59.6 million (National Statistics, 2003)
US: Population: 294 million (US Census Bureau estimate, 2004)
Quote:
Originally posted by MacBaker:
Point 7 Quote: "You will no longer be allowed to own or carry guns." Good luck on that one! You could try to collect the millions of unregistered guns from those of us who legally own them, but my bet is, it will get very bloody! Check your history books about 200 years back for reference, and LEARN from it!
4) Why do you guys always go to violence to solve your problems?
Quote:
Originally posted by MacBaker:
Point 9 Quote: "All American cars are hereby banned. They are crap and it is for your own good." That's funny, considering that Ford now owns your best auto manufacturers, IE; Jaguar, Aston Martin, and Rover. The German's own the rest, Bentley (VW), Mini and Rolls Royce (BMW). It's also interesting that JD Power now scores Cadillac above Audi, BMW, and Mercedes in quality and owner satisfaction. Motor Trend's top 3 finalists in this year's Car Of The Year, were all American cars (the Corvette, the new Mustang GT, and Chrysler's Hemi powered 300C), none of the European entries made it into the top 5!
5) Perhaps you missed the part where he said that he'd introduct you to German cars didn't you.
Quote:
Originally posted by MacBaker:
Point 10 Quote: "You will learn to make real chips." We do know how to make chips! We put them in a bag and call them Ruffles!
6) Maybe you should re-read this one.
Quote:
Originally posted by MacBaker:
Point 11 Quote: "As a sign of penance 5 grams of sea salt per cup will be added to all tea made within the Commonwealth of Massachusetts, this quantity to be doubled for tea made within the city of Boston itself." That's okay, no one in Boston drinks tea. Coffee is the preferred beverage, which is why there's a Starbucks on every freakin' corner!
7) You are aware that Starbuck sells Tea as well, right?
Quote:
Originally posted by MacBaker:
Point 14 Quote: "You will learn to resolve personal issues without using guns, lawyers or therapists." You may call them something else, but you have them too (except the guns, which is why the whole REVOCATION OF INDEPENDENCE stuff will never happen anyway!).
8) I do believe that you've missed his entire point.
Quote:
Originally posted by MacBaker:
Point 16 Quote: "Tax cNOTIFY: Y | REPLY | REPLY WITH QUOTE | PERMALINK | TOP | HOME
Quote:
Originally posted by SigmaNunki:Quote:
Originally posted by MacBaker:
Point 3 Quote: "You should learn to distinguish the English and Australian accents." Sorry, I've never confused Mel Gibson's accent for John Cleese's!
1) < sarcasm >And clearly because you can make the distinction, others won't as well < /sarcasm >
See comment 2.
Sorry, most of us CAN tell the difference. Nicole Kidman and Judi Dench don't sound at all alike. I could give you other examples, but the facts seem to be beyond your comprehension.Quote:
Originally posted by MacBaker:
Point 4 Quote: "Hollywood will be required occasionally to cast English actors as the good guys." HELLO! You ever watch an episode of Buffy or Angel? Wesley and Giles ARE the good guys!
2) I'm not sure that you are aware of the quote "There is an exception to every rule." ie You can't quote one case as a counter example and expect the rule to go away. This isn't math, it's society.
One case? Can't you read? I clearly gave two! They were just the obvious examples, but hardly an exception to any rule. Obi Wan Kenobi, half the cast of Farscape, etc.Quote:
Originally posted by MacBaker:
Point 6 Quote: "The 2.15% of you who are aware that there is a world outside your borders may have noticed that no one else plays "American" football." Ever hear of NFL Europe? More American's actually play Soccer than British do! It's the number one amatuer and pro/am sport in the country!!! Don't even mess with Baseball! Outside of Europe, it's the fastest growing sport in the world. In Asia, and Central and South American countries, it's practically a national sport. Baseball is FAR better than Rounders or Cricket!
3) But what percentage plays which sports in what countries. That is what matters. That is what tells you how big a deal it is. You can't say more play in the US and that proves something, because as you see below the US has... more people.
UK: Population: 59.6 million (National Statistics, 2003)
US: Population: 294 million (US Census Bureau estimate, 2004)
You just skip over any facts you don't like, don't you! Soccer is the number one Am and Pro/Am sport in the US! Period!!!Quote:
Originally posted by MacBaker:
Point 7 Quote: "You will no longer be allowed to own or carry guns." Good luck on that one! You could try to collect the millions of unregistered guns from those of us who legally own them, but my bet is, it will get very bloody! Check your history books about 200 years back for reference, and LEARN from it!
4) Why do you guys always go to violence to solve your problems?
You seem to miss the point. There won't be any violence, until some fop tries to take our guns. Honest lawful gun owners in the US only use our guns for self defense. Unlike you, we don't choose to be victims!Quote:
Originally posted by MacBaker:
Point 9 Quote: "All American cars are hereby banned. They are crap and it is for your own good." That's funny, considering that Ford now owns your best auto manufacturers, IE; Jaguar, Aston Martin, and Rover. The German's own the rest, Bentley (VW), Mini and Rolls Royce (BMW). It's also interesting that JD Power now scores Cadillac above Audi, BMW, and Mercedes in quality and owner satisfaction. Motor Trend's top 3 finalists in this year's Car Of The Year, were all American cars (the Corvette, the new Mustang GT, and Chrysler's Hemi powered 300C), none of the European entries made it into the top 5!
5) Perhaps you missed the part where he said that he'd introduct you to German cars didn't you.
Nope, in fact I clearly mentioned that NO Euorpean cars (including German) made it into the final five, for Car of the Year.Quote:
Originally posted by MacBaker:
Point 10 Quote: "You will learn to make real chips." We do know how to make chips! We put them in a bag and call them Ruffles!
6) Maybe you should re-read this one.
No, we understand what you believe "chips" arNOTIFY: Y | REPLY | REPLY WITH QUOTE | PERMALINK | TOP | HOME
Ah, come on Folks, this should be a fun thread where everyone pulls everyone's leg!
And to do so:
Quote:
Point 9 Quote: "All American cars are hereby banned. They are crap and it is for your own good." That's funny, considering that Ford now owns your best auto manufacturers, IE; Jaguar, Aston Martin, and Rover. The German's own the rest, Bentley (VW), Mini and Rolls Royce (BMW). It's also interesting that JD Power now scores Cadillac above Audi, BMW, and Mercedes in quality and owner satisfaction. Motor Trend's top 3 finalists in this year's Car Of The Year, were all American cars (the Corvette, the new Mustang GT, and Chrysler's Hemi powered 300C), none of the European entries made it into the top 5!
Let me guess, JD Powers is an american institution and Motor Trend is an american magazine?
Keep flying,
Gavida
PS: Man, I love John Cleese!
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Quote:
Originally posted by MacBaker
Thank you for being an example of the typical British self absorbed fop. You people actually still believe you have an Empire! LMAO!
When I read this I just had to paraphrase from my favorite exchange in the movie "Bottle Rocket" (done in my best Luke Wilson impersonation - aw, who am I kidding, I can't do a Luke Wilson impersonation):
SoupCatcher: What part of Britain are you from, SigmaNunki?
SigmaNunki: Canada.
I now cease and desist this digression.
Peace on Earth. Goodwill to everyone
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Quote:
German Customer:I did not start it!
Basil Falty: You invaded poland!
even though i dutch and we do things slightly differnet then the british (we drive on the right and we call lager beer(yay Heineken)) it was fun to read. But that above quote should put everything in perspective after his comment about german cars.
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Quote:
Let me guess, JD Powers is an american institution and Motor Trend is an american magazine?
Keep flying,
Gavida
PS: Man, I love John Cleese!
Yes, but JD Power uses a sampling from not just US owners, but of owners in Europe and Asia (on cars that are also availible in those areas). Motor Trend has included judges from sister publications in europe for years now.
Let's be honest though. Most people have no idea where their car was built anymore. Honda's Civic Si is built in England. Saab's new sport wagon is a Subaru WRX with a new nose, and Saab's new SUV is a rebadged Chevy. Lamborghini's new Gallardo is built by new owners Audi. BMW's X3 and X5 SUVs are built in America. So are most of the trucks and SUVs built by Toyota and Nissan. Half of the Ford F-150's sold, are built in Canada. Half of Jaguar's model line are based on Fords. The new Mazda 3 and Volvo's S40 are Ford Focus based cars. The Toyota Matrix and Pontiac Vibe are built in on the same line in a US plant. Mercedes and BMW both outsource their new automatic transmissions from an American manufacturer. The Honda Accord sold in North America is an American car. It's built in Ohio (has been for over a decade), and it's not sold anywhere else. The Accord sold in Europe is a smaller sedan, and sold in North America as the Acura TSX.
P.S. I love John Cleese too. I spotted him driving in L.A. a few months back, and he was behind the wheel of an American Icon, the new Corvette! I also spotted Paris and Nikki Hilton the same day. They were drivin a Bentley Continental GT. Something seems wrong with that!
I'd given some thought to movin' off the edge -- not an ideal location -- thinkin' a place in the middle.
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Quote:
Originally posted by MacBaker:
It seems that you are the one that's fallen for propaganda. If we hadn't assisited in the European theater during WWII, you'd all still be under Nazi rule! Fact are facts. Our Lend/Lease program helped you before we entered the war, and our manufacturing power and inexahustable supply of bombers broke the Nazi war machines back! Believe what you wish, but history is clear on who beat the Nazi's, the American air power on one front, and the Russian Army on the other front! England is just a footnote!
Thank you for being an example of the typical British self absorbed fop. You people actually still believe you have an Empire! LMAO!
1) I'm not British, I'm Canadian. Perhaps you shouldn't make such assumptions.
2) I appreciate that you continue to provide as an example of the sterotype that this comedy makes fun of (yes it is comedy).
----
"Canada being mad at you is like Mr. Rogers throwing a brick through your window." -Jon Stewart, The Daily Show
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Quote:
Originally posted by wildbill:
4 - Who cares? All British sitcoms are lame
Bullshit.
"You've just gotta go ahead and change the captain of your brainship, because he's drunk at the wheel."
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1) I'm not British, I'm Canadian. Perhaps you shouldn't make such assumptions.
There's a difference?
2) I appreciate that you continue to provide as an example of the sterotype that this comedy makes fun of (yes it is comedy).
The comedy goes both ways (something you seem to be missing). It's humorous that the the author (not really John Cleese BTW) imagines a world where Great Britian could actually revoke something they never gave in the first place, but was taken from them by force. Revolution is a concept the english never seem to understand, despite being on the wrong side of several revolutions during their history. Funny how that concept seems to escape many from Canada too. Hmmmm!
I'd given some thought to movin' off the edge -- not an ideal location -- thinkin' a place in the middle.
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