Simon had just finished testing the... stuff for River. He thought it worked, but he needed to test it. Simon was in an interesting mood. The normal adventure team was going out today, so he thought he should see how it worked on one of them.

Jayne's cup was sitting in the open, so Simon decided to line it with some of the milk-like liquid he had made, but forgot to put on gloves.

Oh well, Simon thought. He would just wash them off afterwards.

About five minutes later, Jayne came in, poured a little powdered milk into his cup, and drank. Since Simon hadn’t put that much in, he didn’t think it would do much. Jayne didn’t seem to be affected. Even when the crew left, he was still acting normal. Maybe Simon hadn’t put enough in. Simon was very, very wrong. About ten minutes later, the mule came back with a very flustered Mal and Zoë.

“Aw, Mal. Why we comin back?” Jayne asked, a pout on his face. Mal turned on him.

“WHY!?? Jayne, we are back because you tried, and succeeded, to *kiss* me! That is why!” Mal seemed to flinch.

“But you looked so... well... Oh God mal, you looked HOT!” Jayne said as easily as if he were talking about pie. Zoë seemed wronged too.

“Zoë... are you Ok?” Simon asked, worried he may have done more bad than good. Zoë looked at him.

“He didn’t go for me first. He went for the captain...” She sounded almost insulted. Simon sighed.

“Captain?” he asked Mal, who was now beating Jayne over the head. After successfully knocking Jayne down, Mal turned to Simon.

“Yes?” He was breathing heavily

“Is there a hotel or someplace to stay in town?” Mal nodded his head yes, then looked up.

“Why? What are you suggesting!?” Simon realized how wrong that sounded at this moment in time.

“Ok... let me explain.” Everyone was listening as he told he ‘he’ had found out about River’s condition. He left the boy out of it. When he was done, Mal was just staring ahead. Simon thought this to be caused of one of two things. 1) he was afraid to leave his ship in the hands of a hormonally stressed