“You know, I can’t help but feel that I’m on deaths door here,” Mal told her, a precarious cautiousness lacing his voice.

“Well hold still and you won’t lose anything valuable,” Inara chided in response. She was on her knees, close to him.

She shuffled her hands quick, causing him to sharply breathe in.

“Oh you’re enjoying this, ain’t ya,” Mal said, half in jest, half in…well nervousness.

Inara wound her hands once more and yanked back. Mal’s subtle response illicited a smile from Inara. “I should ask the same thing captain.”

Mal vented a sigh as she had stopped momentarily. “I just don’t see why my pants half to be on,” he remarked. “I mean, traditionally, don’t you have them off when you do this?”

Inara paid little attention to Mal’s quip and continued her work. “Traditionally,” she said and then let a smirk come to her face, “but this is a special case.”

He grunted and let her continue, feeling the tension of her work in his lower regions.

“Do you do this for clients,” Mal asked out of pure curiosity.

“Hmm, well on occasion,” Inara thought aloud. “If the occasion calls for it.”

Mal chuckled. “Well the occasion certainly called for it here. Does that make me a client?”

“In your crude, pathetic dreams,” Inara blasted.

A sharp jolt of pain ran through that particular area.

Mal yelped in pain. “You did that on purpose!”

“Oh did I hurt you? Gee, I’m sorry captain, I’ll be more careful from now on.”

~~

“You know, it was Captain’s idea to do the whole fancy shindig thing in the first place,” Jayne grunted. “Now he’s the one holdin’ us up.”

Kaylee pulled herself out from under the engine and wiped a splotch of grease from her face.

“Well, Mr. Punctual if you’re so concerned,” she beamed, “why don’t ya go and grab him.”

Jayne adjusted himself and gave Kaylee the hairy eyeball as if the solution to his dilemma had to be more complex. Kaylee rolled her eyes a bit and gave a scoot gesture to the mercenary.

Jayne began to move for the door.

“By the way,” Kaylee began hesi