Hank was giving a good impression of being asleep, even snoring once or twice for verisimilitude. But his back was tense, his shoulders tight.

Zoe closed the hatch and gazed at him. She’d just spent nearly two hours sitting in Inara’s shuttle, trying to make up her mind, and she still hadn’t come to any conclusion. She desperately wanted to speak to her friend, to hash it out with someone who wasn’t going to judge her, but suddenly there was no-one available. Even Freya was pretty much out of the question, with all the things she was having to deal with herself.

She sat down at the table, her back to the bed.

Maybe Jethro might be the person. Only she knew what his answer would be. A child. Bringing a baby into the world, or not. He’d probably say it was a mortal sin. Well, she’d committed a fair few of those in her time, considering one of the few Commandments she had ever remembered was Thou shalt not kill . Broken that one more than once. Although maybe this was just another example.

It wasn’t like they hadn’t talked about it. Hank wanted kids. Wanted them very badly. And most of all, wanted them very badly with her. He loved her. Considered it was the next step, a fair extension of that love.

And all she was doing was trying to decide whether to kill that child before he had a chance to meet him.

She wanted children. Had wanted them with Wash so badly that she’d stopped taking the contraception, letting nature take its course. Made a unilateral decision. Only he’d died before nature had kicked in.

She picked up one of the dinosaurs, turning it over in the light.

He’d have made a great father. Played with them, got into scrapes with them, probably made every excuse under the sun so she wouldn’t get mad with them. And they’d never have stopped at one. There’d have been a whole tribe running around Serenity, getting into trouble, having Mal shout at them to stop making so much noise, only his would be running with them …

She swallowed back the lump in her t