On The Edge: Chapter 4
Wednesday, February 7, 2007
Unexpected complications arise after the crew of Serenity land on a war torn planet. Cannon pairings.
CATEGORY: FICTION TIMES READ: 3504 RATING: 9.0 (PG13) SERIES: FIREFLY
Chapter 3 can be found http://www.fireflyfans.net/bluesun.aspx?bid=15170>; Here and has been edited a fair amount so you might want to go back and re-read before going on to the next chapter.
Thanks to Tamsibling and Mal4Prez for the beta.
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Chapter 4
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Inara rounded the corner and stepped into the make-shift infirmary; slightly taken aback to find Mal looking at her sharply. “When’d you get back?” he demanded. “Kaylee ain’t –“
“No, she’s still sleeping. I took the mule back - I wanted to be of some assistance.” She looked around the room, saw River dozing in a corner with Madeline, and noticed Simon was nowhere in sight. “But it seems like everyone has been taken care of for now.”
“Yeah, I made Simon go lay down before he fell over.”
“He’s very dedicated to his work,” Inara agreed, looking at the bandaged patients lying all around the room.
“Ain’t never been a fault.”
“Then why are you so mad at him?”
Mal’s eyes narrowed and he shot her a blank look, but Inara wasn’t going to let him off so easy.
“Oh, don’t play this game with me, Malcolm Reynolds. Tell me the truth for once.”
He huffed in annoyance and looked away, as if he was trying to find something he needed to do right at that moment.
Her voice dropped a bit of its edge. “Mal?”
The captain sighed and glanced at her. “He’s dedicated to his work, ya just said. So how is it he can’t keep from knockin’ up my mechanic?”
Inara pulled her shawl tighter around her shoulders as the early morning breeze cast a bit of a chill.
“You cannot possibly be so upset with him because he –“ She trailed off, noticing something, some masked look that he quickly hid. “You’re jealous.”
Mal snorted. “Don’t be ridiculous.”
The retort came far too quick for her to believe and Inara regarded him thoughtfully. Had she finally hit on the reason he was so upset with Simon? “Do you, the great Malcolm Reynolds, incapable of keeping the honorable attentions of a woman for more than a
Mental image of reluctant Mal with a Madeline-tail.
More please!
Perfect characterization as usual.
Madeline's a great OC as is her Dad.
the Mal/Inara scene is a highlight for me, the jealousy Mal is hiding palpable.
And have to agree with Uncomprehending..
More please!!!!
Ok, that's out of my system, this is all kinds of shiny. I love the pace of this, and I love the OC's. Aaron and Madeline are really well written and fit into the 'verse perfectly. Not to mention you've got all kinds of well placed angst that seems to go all over the place, but isn't chaotic (not to say war isn't chaotic, but your writing is really tightly done). All in all this is just really great stuff...
... so <ahem> when's the next installment???
Kaylee's condition worries me only because she is suffering an undue amount of stress, as is Simon. His high level of anxiety could end up severely damaging her and by default, the baby.
I also agree with the others - the wait for chapter 4 was interminable ...
Gotta admit though...the Mal/Inara scene? Utterly brilliant because you got the two of them just bouncing off one another in such a spectacular. Inara calling Mal on his jealousy of having a child, Mal calling Inara on her continued presence on Serenity...I was totally picturing Nathan and Morena just wringing the words for all their worth;D
BEB
That reaction put a smile on my face. Thank you:)
I'm glad you're liking the OC's. I hate writing them because I just don't think I'm good at it - and I'd really rather focus on the original characters. But I wanted to branch out and this story is the result.
Sorry, you have to wait for the next chapter.
Yhere are 12, in case anyone cares to know :)
Truer words were never written Amber.
I'm really stating to fear for Kaylee's health. Simon's too, but he's not pregnant.
Oh, snarky Inara. How I love thee.
Great chapter. I'm waiting for some Mal-Kaylee interaction, maybe a confrontation of sorts. ;)
Reminds me of their escape from the Companion training house during the movie (probably one of the deleted scenes). :)
And, the list:
1- Mal (“You didn’t want to come in the first place, now all you want to do is stay?” Burn! It was a toss-up here, but Mal comes first because of this line.)
2- Inara (Awesome characterization.)
3- Simon (You write him confused well, too.)
4- Kaylee (The accent isn't such a problem here, because there's less of it. The characterization, I feel, is also slightly off, like a nearly-straight line. Pretty good, nonetheless.)
5- River (It's not that you've done her bad, but that I think, of all the characterizations, hers is weakest.)
Don't think there's enough for Zoë or Jayne. Run away, run away! The crew in action is good.
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