Freya was sitting in the common area in one of the easy chairs, her hand across her face.

“Frey?” Inara called from the entrance to the cargo bay.

Freya wiped her eyes quickly. “Yeah?”

“Are you all right?” Inara asked, stepping down.

“Shiny.” She tried to smile but it didn’t really work.

“What is it?” Inara asked, taking a seat next to her friend.

“It’s … it’s hard,” Freya admitted.

Inara nodded. Freya didn’t have to say another word – everyone on board understood, even if they didn’t know the depth of her feelings. But Inara, with all her training, could pick up Freya’s distress more than most. “It will get better,” she said, taking the other woman’s hand in hers.

“Inara, the things that have happened to me, all the … the Academy, the war, then more recently… Maice, Lon … so many things that have hurt, so much … yet … I've got scars, Inara, so many that I daren’t count them, both inside and out. But this – I feel like my heart’s been ripped out.”

Even Inara was shocked at the raw pain in her voice. “Freya –“

“Please, Inara. Don’t.” She shook her head.

“Do you want to be alone?”

“No.” Freya shook her head again. “No, I don’t.”

“Where’s Mal?” Inara glanced towards the cargo bay.

“Keeping busy,” Freya said. “Only way he can cope with it. Only I don’t really have anything to do.”

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“Not really. I just … need company. Someone who understands.”

“Come on.” Inara stood up. “Come to my shuttle. We won’t be disturbed there.”

---

“You can talk about it,” Inara said, settling Freya down on the red satin sofa.

“No, I can’t,” the other woman said, sitting stiffly, her back ramrod straight. “No-one wants to hear any more.”

“That isn’t true,” Inara insisted. “Everyone understands what you’re going through.” She lifted a hand to forestall Freya’s next words. “And yes, they do. Not one on board hasn’t lost someone. Whether in the war, before or since, we’ve all lost people we care about.”

“It’s not so much …” Frey