The traditional obligatory offering to Boss Joss. Love his work, got bored, and decided to to run with it!

This is a story co-written with a very good friend of mine, aka DeanWinchester here at FF.net. Humor, smut, jealousy, with just a dash of angst thrown in later chapters to make things interesting. ;-D Bask in the Mal/Inara-ness!

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The captain stepped into the bridge, taking a seat in the pilot’s chair as he began his time honored tradition of mocking Inara when she wasn't looking. Lifting up his hands, he turned them both into his little puppets. Mal raised his left hand dubbing that Inara and his right himself.

"I'm Inara and I think I'm just so pretty and graceful, but really I'm boring and I have bad hair." His voice went up high.

"I'm Mal and I'm just so ruggid and good looking sometimes its hard to keep the women off me." His voice went deep.

"Oh my God I picked the wrong pigheaded weirdo to sell my breasts too. Save me Mal!"

"Just this once, but later you will ah...uh...rub my feet!" He bellowed.

"Alright. Shoot him you manly man. You saved me!" With that he flung his left hand towards his right.

"No need to thank me. It's what I do. Since I'm so terrifically strong and brave." He backed his right hand up making it tense up.

"Oh your so hunky and I'm just so frumpy. Its hard to be me when I put on this act to be perfect. I really should fix my hair."

"That you should, that you should…"

Jayne, who had left the tranquility of his weight bench, deciding he didn't want to be alone with the whack job around a big set of weights, felt he'd have a word with Mal. Moving through the corridors, he purposely ignored the kitchen, knowing the lovey couple would be in there. Coming into the cockpit, he found Mal talking and making hand puppets. He stood for a couple minutes in the doorway watching him.

"If your goin' crazy, do I get the ship?" Jayne asked, stepping inside. Mal jerked and spun around facing the other man.

"Jayne if