More about sex and Inara
POSTED BY: mal4prez
UPDATED: Saturday, August 1, 2009 19:12
VIEWED: 20411
PAGE 10 of 11
Thanks, it is appreciated.
SGG
Tawabawho?
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...this has occured to me as well, that on some level her character is emblematic of the Earth, of all the things that Mal gave up (as referred to in the song).[i/]
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This has occurred to me as well, and more lately than ever before (in my advanced years I'm finally getting so wisdom, who'd of thunk it!).
And another thing that came to mind, we never got to know about Mal's life before Serenity. Was Inara his true love? (I tend to think yes). Did he have a significant other, a Mrs. Reynolds, somewhere in the verse?
Your right about the song, Inara and Serenity. Actually, as I think about it more, Inara and Serenity are one. Mal fell the moment he saw her, Serenity that is. I dare say that it was the same with Inara, although with Inara he would never admit it, not even to himself. I think that in future eps River would help the both of them in that regard. That's just the romantic in me.
I'm beginning to think that Serenity and Inara are what Mal 'gave up' in the Valley. Or rather the feeling/belief he had prior to the Alliance ships raining havoc on the Valley. In the BDM we see him smile and talk about love making her fly, it was not until now that I see what Joss was referring to when Mal asked Zoe if she would hold together. It wasn't just about Zoe or the ship. He was also referring to Inara. All the women in his life were wounded but on the mend, including Serenity. Inara was lost(but now found), River is better, Simon finally declared himself to Kaylee and Zoe lost her best friend. But somehow you get the feeling she'll be okay. (Although I picture her crying in her bunk at the sight of even one dinosaur).
Did you ever notice that Zoe rarely spoke her feelings except, of course, when it came to Wash's genius piloting skills. She was so proud. Actually, in the pilot, she told Simon he wouldn't make it to the Feds if Kaylee didn't. But that's another thread.
SGG
Tawabawho?
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I never said that Mal didn't like flying. I said that he doesn't actually like being a criminal. Sure, it has it's fun moments, and he gets to live with his middle finger in the air at the Alliance (to borrow a great line from Mal4Prez's story), but that doesn't mean it's what he wanted to be when he was just a boy from Shadow, who went off to fight in a war. Or even after, when he was buying Serenity. His little speech about staying one step further from Alliance control doesn' say anything in it that he anticipates doing so by crime. He probably thought he could operate legitimately, and so the Alliance would just leave him alone.
The thing is. Serenity is a beautiful ship, a character all in her self with a long sad history. And she's a symbol of home in a crew where EVERYONE has lost a home. Inara, Simon, River, and Mal are obvious. Kaylee chose to leave, cheerfully, but because of hardship. I suspect Wash, Book, Jayne, and Zoe are similar stories.
But. Serenity belies her name, she's surrounded by violence and tragedy, and in that environment, healing can't really take place. Despite all that she is, she's a place, a thing, both of which can be taken away. The love that the crew has for each other, that's the real home, that's where healing is. And that's one of the things that the crew, and Mal in particular, have to realize, otherwise they'll cling to Serenity, she'll become a limitation that keeps them from leading fuller lives because they're STUCK to a bare bones hand-to-mouth place-to-place criminal existence.
It's easy to idealize Serenity. The crew makes her a good place, makes her a home. But it's a hard life, a half-life, and they'll die that way, either physically, from a gunfight or a breakdown, or spiritually, if they don't recognize it's not the ship they need but their connection to each other.
Mal would break NOW if you took Serenity away, I agree. That's because he is not HEALED, and he needs to. And it's not the ship or his lifestyle that can do that, but his crew.
Mal is a remarkable leader, and he can make the hard decisions most people would balk at. But that doesn't mean all the frustration, stress, and pressure he's under is good for him, on top of his long standing issues of bitterness and depression. He may have found some happiness and contentment with his ship, but he hasn't yet found serenity yet. He's still very much at war, with himself and the entire universe.
Serenity has helped him, I'll say that. I think there was a time after the war where he REALLY had nothing, not even anything really to live for, and Serenity and Zoe, and then the crew and Inara gave him that. But there are negatives, significant ones, that could become road blocks to Mal improving, and when he has gotten better enough, I think he'll have to leave Serenity behind him. But so long as his crew stands with him, he'll be fine.
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Getting into this discussion a bit late, but this is such a central theme for Firefly/Serenity, and as I'm a newly-minted fanfic writer, I've been thinking about this issue a lot. Personally, I've "retired" Inara in my one and only fic because I think it's more interesting. If she were just to go back to renting the shuttle and taking clients, it would be like Miranda never happened - I'm really interested in how the BDM affected everyone, its aftermath, etc. and I think both Mal and Inara would be radically altered by what happened. Also, I do think her profession is a barrier to them getting together, and while that's interesting on the screen, in the 'verse of fanfic, I want smootchies!
I don't think anyone has pointed this out, but I find it very telling that after HoG, Inara decides to leave, and the implication is that, at least in part, her and Mal's complicated relationship is getting in the way of her work - but when she actually does leave, she doesn't work as a Companion anymore. She still is one, but at the Training House. We're not told explicity whether she is or isn't taking clients, but given they're not in the Core, the prospective client pool would be somewhat limited on the planet where the Training House is. I choose to believe she didn't take clients while she was away from Serenity, because it fits my view of the post-BDM universe. :)
I think the point about Inara's profession in relation to her relationship with Mal is that he doesn't think it's worthy of her. He thinks she has to become someone new for each client, and so the clients don't ever really know her or see her for who she is. But I do think he's a monogamous kind of guy, so the sex part of her profession will always be an issue.
Inara's reaction to Mal sleeping with Nandi is also telling - she says that not being puritanical about sex means you don't have to be embarassed after, and she means that - but she's very upset by Mal sleeping with Nandi - why? If she's the type of person who would be in an open relationship - ie continue to be a Companion, sleeping with other people, then why would Mal sleeping with Nandi upset her, given Inara and Mal are not even in a relationship? The implication is that it's ok for her to have "meaningless" sex but not for him. She was deeply hurt by his actions - one presumes she would be even more so if they were actually a couple.
In terms of giving up her profession - she doesn't have to give it up. She can continue to do what she was doing at the Training House or something similar. I've been toying with the idea of her having an apprentice - someone to rent the shuttle and be Serenity's resident Companion, while learning from Inara's vast experience. Look at real-world (ie 21st century Earth) sex workers - most stop doing actual sex work at some point, either because they decide to have a "conventional" (please don't flame me for that phrase, I just can't think of how else to say it) relationship, or for other reasons (they become madams, or go into completely other lines of work, start support organizations for sex workers, the list goes on).
GR - loved your post. Just wanted to say that.
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Ahhh, but there's the thing. I'm not sure Inara giving up her profession would be a rational response to Miranda, because there's not really any indication that the Guild is affected by the Alliance anymore than the Guild supports the Alliance because it's good for business. Now, if she were to quit because she wants to be with Mal, post Miranda, I could see that a bit better... EXCEPT, that her just giving up her profession not only limits her independence, but also that it completely ends the conflict the two of them have over her profession, which really needs to be resolved if they're going to have a meaningful relationship. I don't think either of them can ignore her profession, even if Inara were no longer IN it, because of Mal's trust issues.
I don't think Inara's reaction to Mal sleeping with Nandi was hypocritical because I think there's more to what's going on with her than meets the eye. I think there's very real reasons she thinks she CAN'T be with Mal, and seeing him move on is a kick to the stomach, because more than ever she can't have him. I don't think it was the meaningless sex at all, but if that did play any role, it was in that Inara knows that sex means something to Mal, much more than it does for her.
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I'm not necessarily saying that Inara giving up her profession is a rational reaction to Miranda - I'm just saying that I think it would be detrimental to the story if she just went back to renting the shuttle, and taking clients wherever the jobs took the crew. It would be just like before she left, and I think that would do a disservice to the events of the BDM. It's not just about Inara - I think that lots about their lives would change. Would Simon and River still be fugitives? Would Jayne become any more contemplative? How would Zoe deal with being a widow? Etc.I guess I just think that it's more interesting, story-wise, for things to change after Miranda.
One reason I gravitate toward the idea of Inara retiring is a scene from the shooting script (which I think they must have rehearsed, at least, as there are still pictures from it in the Serenity Companion) where Inara follows Mal out from the Search and Rescue craft, just after seeing the recording, and tells him that she doesn't know how to do this, that she needs his help. I guess I take that to mean that her worldview is seriously threatened by what she sees on Miranda.
I didn't mean to imply that Inara was hypocritical in her reaction to Mal's sleeping with Nandi - but rather that it would be hypocritical of her to expect Mal to be fine with her going on with being a Companion, considering how upset she was about him sleeping with Nandi. I do think you're right, though, that she knows that Mal isn't cavalier about sex, and so him being with Nandi meant something. But I don't think what Inara does is about sex either - that's one of the reasons she draws a distinction between Companions and whores. She chooses her clients carefully - knowing that the sex actually does mean something.
I don't think that Inara giving up her profession would magically make all the issues she and Mal have go away. I just think that a relationship between them would be impossible unless she ceased taking clients. Mal would have to do some heavy compromising too - or growing really - to deal with his intimacy issues, etc.
I agree that they'd need to deal with her profession, even if she were to quit, but I think the issue is that he doesn't seem to have a problem with sex for money generally (he seems just fine with Nandi). He thinks Inara's too good for it. Which is the crux of the problem: he thinks she's too good for him. And I think he'll need to take her off the pedastal, or they don't stand a chance.
I like discussing this, though - it gets my brain thinking about all sorts of possibilities. Thanks for keeping it going, since I missed it the first time! 
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Quote:
I agree that they'd need to deal with her profession, even if she were to quit, but I think the issue is that he doesn't seem to have a problem with sex for money generally (he seems just fine with Nandi). He thinks Inara's too good for it. Which is the crux of the problem: he thinks she's too good for him. And I think he'll need to take her off the pedastal, or they don't stand a chance.
That, I do agree with.
I guess maybe I see Inara's having sex as different from Mal having sex. In Those Left Behind, River says "You cheated" to Mal, not Inara. With Inara, she may care about her clients, but it's not the same way, so it's not cheating. Only Mal doesn't see that.
And I can't figure out a better way how the issues that Inara's profession brings up can be resolved than her continuing to be in it. It's more potent than if she stopped, Mal's problems would be both justified and not because it's not what he thinks.
And furthermore, a Mal who refuses to be with Inara because of her profession, requiring her to give it up, is an interpretation of Mal that I don't like. If Mal wants a relationship with her, he has to learn to accept her. And I also don't like an Inara who capitulates so readily.
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I don't know. I think it's completely true to Mal's character that he wouldn't be able to be with Inara (or anyone, for that matter) if she were still taking clients. Because that does mean something different to him than it does to her (or does it? She's pretty non-committal about her thoughts on having a relationship as a Companion, and I think she chooses to be a Companion rather than a more conventional life where she could have a long term relationship, because she's rather be wholly independent). Even were he to deal with all his issues about her career, apart from the her-having-sex-with-other-people thing, he still would never be okay with her having sex with clients. Regardless of the fact that it's a different kind of sex/intamacy than she would have with him. I think that's just who he is. And I don't think that's crazy or out of line on his part. I don't know a whole lot of people who would be okay with their partners having sex with other people, regardless of it being a job. There are some people who can deal with it - Mal is not one of them.
But, he knows he has no right to ask her to give it up. Which is why he never does. He says that more than once - in Shindig, he says he's got no call to stop her, in HoG he says he's not asking anything of her, etc. And I don't know about Inara "capitulating." I think she would, at some point, make a choice between the two. And it's much more fun for her to choose to be with Mal
It's a bit of a troublesome issue, because the good feminists in all of us want to believe that she shouldn't have to give up anything for the man she loves, she can still have her independence, blah-de-blah. I'm troubled by the fact that sacrifice is seen as a sell-out when a woman does it for a relationship. Okay, not going to get into a post-feminist analysis. More than I already have... 
It's a beautiful set-up for a tv show, because it's a seemingly insurmountable barrier - they can't be together, but they don't want to be apart. It's a time-honoured device, and it works. I mean, here we are still talking about this relationship and where it could have gone.
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I like Mal and Inara as much as anyone, and I hope they work it out. But Inara being a fictional character, of a cast of characters I enjoy and have an emotional investment in, I would be very concerned for Inara entering a relationship with Mal and not having anything to fall back on.
If Mal hasn't worked out his issues in advance, I foresee a very tumultuous relationship, and likely a tumultuous one even AFTER he has because of the way he thinks and because he's almost as bad as Simon when it comes to putting his foot in his mouth. If Inara goes into that relationship, and it's on again off again... Let me ask you. Would YOU give up a steady long term job and a source of income for that kind of uncertainty? I think that's a good way to get left high and dry. Inara is a business woman, and rational.
And also, this continues to not address the problem that the sacrifice would not be mutual. In all fairness, if they want to start a life together, Mal should give up the job that could very likely kill them both, and Inara should give up the job that drives her prospective partner to fits of jealous rage, angsting, and misery. Because you may be right, and it won't work out with Inara in her job, but it won't work out with Mal the way he is in his job, too.
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I totally agree. I think Mal should give up the dangerous aspects of his job. It's just the topic was more focused on Inara.
I get your point about Inara giving up her job for something that may or may not work out - but it's not like she couldn't go back to it if Mal did manage to put his foot in it so bad it couldn't be fixed(and to be fair, she gives as good as she gets). I also don't forsee them having some big, "I love you, let's live happily ever after" type moment, after which Inara immediately quits the Guild never to return or have anything to do with them. I think they would go about this the way they always have - little baby steps. Just more of the forward variety, rather than the backward. I think that the acknowledgment (I can never spell that, so apologies if it's wrong ) that they are both willing to try would go a long way. I'm just saying that a proper relationship between them would not be possible if Inara were still seeing clients. And she could do other things - ie train other Companions, like we've seen. She wouldn't have to give it up completely. And really, I think Inara has much more to fall back on than Mal does - she's respected, intelligent, well connected and from a Core planet. Mal, on the other hand, seems to be good at getting shot and stealing things (but really, not so great at stealing things, at least, not without getting shot or otherwise injured!) - he's got a lot more to lose by giving up his "career."
I do wonder if Inara would insist on safer jobs. She doesn't seem to mind the illegal stuff, but I think she would have as much of a problem watching him go off to potentially get killed as he would watching her go off to service a client.
I do wonder what else he could do though - and of course, of all this in a post-Miranda context. Very very interesting.
Maybe she has to be the one to take a risk - one of them has to, why not her?
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