Loafer's Nook 26 - Post Birthday Posts

POSTED BY: Jadehand
UPDATED: Sunday, December 3, 2006 22:54
VIEWED: 11284
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SERYN

Monday, November 27, 2006 10:03 PM

i have a tartan! or at least, i'm told i have, someone was once very insistant that young was a scottish name and had its own tartan.

I'm not bothered anyway - the wool is always scratchy and kilts are such an unflattering look on me.

Isn't sanity really a one trick pony, anyway? I mean all you get is one trick, rational thinking! But when you're good and crazy...ooh hoo hoo hoo... the skys the limit!
http://www.myspace.com/seryndippyt

JADEHAND

Monday, November 27, 2006 10:08 PM

you can get non wool kilts.... leather is nice, but hard to get leather wtih a tartan.

"Reality is something that you rise above
We don't see things as they are, we see them as we are
Avoiding danger is no safer in the long run
The fearful fall foul of fate as often as the reckless."
Rich(.Com)-Marillion
visit WWW.Marillion.com for a better way of life.

CITIZEN

Monday, November 27, 2006 11:56 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by seryn:
i have a tartan! or at least, i'm told i have, someone was once very insistant that young was a scottish name and had its own tartan.

http://www.rampantscotland.com/clans/blclanyoung.htm
http://www.clanyoung.org/

More insane ramblings by the people who brought you beeeer milkshakes!
No one can see their reflection in running water. It is only in still water that we can see.

CALLMESERENITY

Tuesday, November 28, 2006 2:23 PM

I'm supposed to have a tartan, too, but my grandfather can't remember his grandmother's maiden name, so we can't figure out the clan.

Serenity,
President of The Juggled Gosling Chatroom
Bride8

http://callmeserenity.livejournal.com/

CITIZEN

Tuesday, November 28, 2006 5:30 PM

Actual call centre conversations:
Customer: "I've been ringing 0700 2300 for two days and can't get through to enquiries, can you help?".
Operator: "Where did you get that number from, sir?".
Customer: "It was on the door to the Travel Centre".
Operator: "Sir, they are our opening hours".

Samsung Electronics
Caller: "Can you give me the telephone number for Jack?"
Operator: "I'm sorry, sir, I don't understand who you are talking about".
Caller: "On page 1, section 5, of the user guide it clearly states that I need to unplug the fax machine from the AC wall socket and telephone Jack before cleaning. Now, can you give me the number for Jack?"
Operator: "I think it means the telephone point on the wall".

RAC Motoring Services
Caller: "Does your European Breakdown Policy cover me when I am travelling in Australia ?"
Operator: " Doesn't the product name give you a clue?"

Caller (enquiring about legal requirements while travelling in France)
"If I register my car in France , do I have to change the steering wheel to the other side of the car?"

Directory Enquiries
Caller: "I'd like the number of the Argoed Fish Bar in Cardiff please".
Operator: "I'm sorry, there's no listing. Is the spelling correct?"
Caller: "Well, it used to be called the Bargoed Fish Bar but the 'B' fell off".

Then there was the caller who asked for a knitwear company in Woven.
Operator: "Woven? Are you sure?"
Caller: "Yes. That's what it says on the label; Woven in Scotland ".

On another occasion, a man making heavy breathing sounds from a phone box told a worried operator:
"I haven't got a pen, so I'm steaming up the window to write the number on".

Tech Support: "I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop".
Customer: "OK".
Tech Support: "Did you get a pop-up menu?".
Customer: "No".
Tech Support: "OK. Right-Click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?"
Customer: "No".
Tech Support: "OK, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until this point?".
Customer: "Sure. You told me to write 'click' and I wrote 'click'".

Tech Support: "OK. In the bottom left hand side of the screen, can you see the 'OK' button displayed?"
Customer: "Wow. How can you see my screen from there?"

Caller: "I deleted a file from my PC last week and I have just realised that I need it.
If I turn my system clock back two weeks will I have my file back again?".

I've heard this one in so many different versions it's unreal, I think it's actually an Urban legend but funny:

There's always one. This has got to be one of the funniest things in a long time. I think this guy should have been promoted, not fired. This is a true story from the Word Perfect Helpline, which was transcribed from a recording monitoring the customer care department. Needless to say the Help Desk employee was fired; however, he/she is currently suing the Word Perfect organization for "Termination without Cause".

Actual dialogue of a former WordPerfect Customer Support employee.
(Now I know why they record these conversations!):

Operator: "Ridge Hall, computer assistance; may I help you?"
Caller: "Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."
Operator: "What sort of trouble??"
Caller: "Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away."
Operator: "Went away?"
Caller: "They disappeared."
Operator: "Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?"
Caller: "Nothing."
Operator: "Nothing??"
Caller: "It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type."
Operator: "Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out??"
Caller: "How do I tell?"
Operator: "Can you see the C: prompt on the screen??"
Caller: "What's a sea-prompt?"
Operator: "Never mind, can you move your cursor around the scr

CALLMESERENITY

Tuesday, November 28, 2006 5:42 PM

LOL! "wrote click" ha ha ha!

Thanks for the laugh!!

Serenity,
President of The Juggled Gosling Chatroom
Bride8

http://callmeserenity.livejournal.com/

JADEHAND

Tuesday, November 28, 2006 6:19 PM

These things are always funny. I love the one I heard about the caller who complained that the cup holder on her computer was broken. You know, you push the button and the little tray slides out for you to put your cup on........ yeah.

"Reality is something that you rise above
We don't see things as they are, we see them as we are
Avoiding danger is no safer in the long run
The fearful fall foul of fate as often as the reckless."
Rich(.Com)-Marillion
visit WWW.Marillion.com for a better way of life.

SIMONWHO

Tuesday, November 28, 2006 6:41 PM

I haven't had any stupid stupid customers yet but some do make me wonder...

Anyone up for a housewarming?

CITIZEN

Tuesday, November 28, 2006 7:18 PM

Is it the type of house warming where we bring our own petrol or is it the type where you bring your own bottle?

We've had some DUMB users.

My printer is broken, it says check tray one.

Have you tried putting paper in it?

Oh...

That's the home office for you.

The site team at MOD main building excelled themselves today. They sent us a call because a printer had no power, which is hardly surprising since it wasn't plugged in.

More insane ramblings by the people who brought you beeeer milkshakes!
No one can see their reflection in running water. It is only in still water that we can see.

JADEHAND

Tuesday, November 28, 2006 7:22 PM

what kind of crappy printer is that? Not having power without being plugged in... geeze, what junk.

"Reality is something that you rise above
We don't see things as they are, we see them as we are
Avoiding danger is no safer in the long run
The fearful fall foul of fate as often as the reckless."
Rich(.Com)-Marillion
visit WWW.Marillion.com for a better way of life.

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