People who talk at the theatre...
POSTED BY: minime
UPDATED: Monday, April 10, 2006 13:32
VIEWED: 7267
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I have rarely had too many problems in the theatre, but when I went to go see Slither there was the typical ethnic stereotype there. (I won't go into anymore details about that) But when the movie started up and got going and the gross crap started happening she was talking to the actors on the screen VERY loudly. "Oh my god what's wrong with your face." "Don't go down there." "Kick the shit out of him he ain't no good." And so on and so on. After about the sixth time of being shushed she finally stopped, thankfully, and I could enjoy the rest of the movie. I realized that Book had it all right, she will be going to the "Special Hell." 
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we thank fully don't get to many of them in our places, we get the total retards detailed in the list above though. Gods give me strength.
My favorite, absolute best trip to a cinema (please read this with as much sarcasm as you can inject into it) was sitting down at a local multiplex and a herd of those backpacker types come in (you know the ones, they either don't speak a word of english, or they know loads and seem to think that thats makes them better than you, and they wear, for some unknown reason, every single colour they can in eyebal melting hues, fabrics that I wouln't line my dogs bed with and leave fruit pealings all over the place -but thats another rant entirely) Well, these guys didn't speak english, so guess what, they bought their own translator.
yup, a guy who repeated every single line to them in their own language loud enough so that everyone in the group could hear him, and for that matter, the entire cinema too.
I mean, I could understand them wanting to go if it were some local film that would never be shown anywhere else or some 3D thing at the London Imax, but it was some friggin summer blockbuster, it would have been on in their own country with subtitles or dubbing or whatever.
It was just unbelievable.
I do however have an admission to make, I once sat and quipped my way through a film, it was so damn dreadful that just couldn't help ourselves (Austin Powers 3 or something) and I do regret annoying all others in the cinema (except the egits we went with, they needed the punishment for making us go in the first place)
I am going to that special hell...
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Hodgins: Your robot reminds me of you. You tell it to turn it stops. You tell it to stop it turns. You ask it to take out the garbage it watches reruns of Firefly.
FozzieWash, You know what I always say: sometimes you're the windshield, sometimes you're the bug!
KermieMal, I never Know what the heck you're talking about.
FozzieWash, Hey, look! They're sending us free lumber!
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I ran into a new one (for me) at one of the Serenity showings I went to -- thankfully, not the first.
It was a stadium-style theater. In front of me sat a middle-aged guy, not some teenage kid. Repeatedly, throughout the first half of the movie, he pulled out his cell phone and did something-or-other... checked email, or PMs, or something. The damn thing was bright as a headlight in the dark theater, and it was absolutely impossible not to be distracted by it.
After awhile I leaned forward and asked him not to do it. He didn't even seem to understand what I was objecting to. After one further blast in the eyeballs he got up and left. Good riddance!
I too have to wonder: why are those people even in the theater?
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I don't disagree on any particular point.
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Me, it's other peoples' knees. Especially if they don't belong to anyone to whom I have been married for a considerable number of years.
I'm British, which makes me distinctly standoffish for a start, but if some bloke sits next to me, I really really don't want his splayed knees rubbing against mine. *Shudder*
Take my word for it, man, I really am the last person your body language should be telling that you are fertile, available and big on cod-cooling.
Epic list, Sands.
All my pet hates in one place, and all the reasons I will only go to a Film Theatre at gun- or knifepoint. (Mrs G has, during the aforementioned considerable number of years, learned all there is to know about coercion. She is lovely, though.)
One you missed. The person who gets a mobile phone call, having stupidly forgotten to switch it off, is mightily embarrassed and flustered as they struggle to find the phone (how hard can it be, idiot), grins apologetically to everyone. Then takes the bloody call...
G
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Quote:
Originally posted by Sands:
7. People who come in during the trailers and stand in the isles and ask what ever idiot they walked in with “where do you wanna sit?”
This one happens to me EVERY TIME I go the movies!
It's like, "Walk in, stay quite, and LOOK for an open seat!"
JOSSIS(Most Definitely)AGOD
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I went with some friends to see "Bringing Down The House" (Steve Martin, Queen Latifah tat) a few years ago and about half way through the movie the guy in front of us started making very loud monkey noises. Funny now but actually quite scary at the time LOL.
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Mal: Wheel never stops turning, Badger.
Badger: That only matters to the people on the rim.
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Wow, Sands, you've been thinking about this! Hope this thread has been cathartic for you...
Gotta agree especially with the:
talking very loudly through the previews
mobile phone lights
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A tip for everyone: wait a week. If you go opening day the theater will be crowded with retards, if you wait a week or two then the people who will be there are most likely people like you who are trying to avoid the retards. The only movie that I saw opening week was Matrix Reloaded (I skipped school to go to it). Most of the time when I see movies (about 4 or 5 in the last 2 years) I don't see it for a few weeks and then the theater is nearly empty.
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Quote:
Originally posted by DesktopHippie:
This thread reminds me of that scene in The Simpsons where Homer is walking out of 'The Empire Strikes Back' and, as he's walking past a queue of people waiting to get in says "Wow! Who would have thought that Darth Vader was Luke Skywalker's Dad!"
Ah, that brings back more memories... 1983, Hollywood, 9:00 a.m. opening day, waiting in line for "Return of the Jedi", someone from the 6:00 a.m. showing walked by and said "I didn't know she was his sister." Not quite as bad as Homer but it didn't take much to guess it was Luke & Leia not Hans & Leia.
Annoying but not quite as annoying as having the fannish audience cheer during the cremation of Darth Vader. What part of Redemption did they not get? Or was all just whizbang special effects that they came for?
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"'Course, there are other schools of thought."
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People always kick the back of my seat when I go to a movie. It never fails. Although one of my most annoying movie experiences was last fall when I went to see Bewitched. About two seats down from me was a woman who had brought her 3 or 4 year old daughter and guess what the little girl was playing with?! A plastic grocery bag. Not even kidding- she was shaking the thing around the whole time. I wanted to die. I've come to the realization that I will NEVER understand people.
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