USS SereniTREE: A Tale of Two Trees
POSTED BY: TheGreyJedi
UPDATED: Sunday, July 24, 2005 12:55
VIEWED: 32596
PAGE 18 of 23
umm..did Emma just go crazy and fall asleep?
"Somebody has to do something, and it's just incredibly pathetic that it has to be us." ~Jerry Garcia
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*twg gently lays the gun at Static’s feet. She notices the Brides, Dr. Whom, and the rest moving about and talking, but she ignores them all. She leaves the hanger without a word to anyone. She stops by the bar and grabs a bottle of Skyy, Grey Goose, Ketel, and Finlandia. She shuffles off to an unknown corner of the ship to get a little numb.*
Why didn’t *swig* I just push her out the airlock? *gulp, gulp* Wouldn’t have been nearly as messy. *gulp* I didn’t realize I was so evil. *guzzle* She would have hurt someone right? *next bottle* Would she?
*after emptying the contents of all the bottles into her stomach, she curls into the fetal position and dreams of hula hoops and lucky charms*
www.thatweirdgirl.com
---
"...turn right at the corner then skip two blocks...no, SKIP, the hopping-like thing kids do...Why? Why not?"
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*twg stirs as she hears someone enter the lounge*
Hey twg, don't be too hard on yourself. She was evil and if this adventure has taught us anything, it's that evil must be confronted, face on. If we try to conceal it or hide away from it, it'll only grow.
*twg nods forlornly*
I mean, take me for example. You don't get into medicine unless you really want to help people. But sometimes you've got to ask yourself, what about all the people you didn't help? Couldn't you have done something more? Tried harder?
You have thoughts like that and you can either deal with them or bury them. And if you bury them, they'll rot away inside you. And then one day, something or somebody will dig them up again and, well, payback can be a bitch. And so can I.
*produces large firearm*
Don't worry sweetness, you're just bait. There's something I've got to do before I can play any more games with you.
*activates ship's intercom*
Hello? Testing, testing, 1, 2, 3. Now that I have your full attention, I have a question to ask. 
I'm sorry, was that a little loud?
This is for my weaker half. I'm in the lounge. I have your friend and a very large gun.
Come alone. Come unarmed. Come ready to die.
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"Come on. We gotta get there some day. Did you just piss on my new *leather* boots?!?"
*Piffleponie neighs innocently*
"Just for that. You dont get the pasture today! Two can play that game"
*And off Piffle draged her pony into the barn...*
I dont wear underwear...You know that...I mean!?!
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Quote:
Originally posted by SimonWho:
*produces large firearm*
*holding her head in her hands, twg mumbles* bloody hell
www.thatweirdgirl.com
---
"...turn right at the corner then skip two blocks...no, SKIP, the hopping-like thing kids do...Why? Why not?"
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*Realizes she has been asleep for an unaturally long time and wakes up just in time to enjoy the trip home*
I'm HUNGRY!
I'm bored!
Ohh and I really gotta pee.
ARE WE THERE YET?
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**** BACKING UP A BIT, AFTER TWG FACED HER EVIL HALF, BUT BEFORE THE ARRIVAL OF THE MALCOMETTES ****
* Thinking fast, Bride5 recovers quickly enough to cover Bluefishies’s eyes so that she does not see the alarming scene of the EvilWeirdGirl. She and XanderLHarris excort Bluefishie out of the hanger bay. Bride6 is left on the deck next to the Admiral Nelson where she fainted. The Ebo Golem and a herd of kissies also come off of the Nelson. The Ebo Golem stands there, waiting. *
* The hatch of the recently landed General Grant opens, and out comes Bride2, Bride3, Bride4, a pair of Zoe-clones, some Yeti, and some Windmill Giants. *
* The two General Lees race to the Sereni-Tree’s hanger bay. They are dangerously close when their retro thrusters blast at full power. They land with a jolt, one touching down bare moments before the other. The techno-magical force fields of TheGreyJedi barely absorb and bleed off the kinetic energy and keep the atmosphere intact. Hatches open and passengers disembark from both shuttles. *
* Rat strolls off the False General Lee, a smug look on his face. *
* River-clone skips up from the True General Lee, followed by Nugget. She squints and sticks out her tongue at Rat. Then she smiles and giggles. *
River-clone: Two out of three?
* Rat is followed out of the False Lee by a large number of others, some with an uneasy walk, some being carried, and others dropping to kiss the ground. They are: TheRealMe, PsychicRiver, Montanagirl, Mai, Jazaf, Ebonezer, a pair of Zoe-Clones, Emma, Jake7, a few yeti, and some kissies. TheRealMe pops the truck latch of the False Lee. *
TheRealMe: Here, anybody want to fuse with their evil twin, now? Everybody’s off the False Sereni-Tree now except Soul. Hmmm… you know, we really don’t need TWO General Lees. Maybe we should rename one. How about the Napoleon Bonaparte?
Zoe-clone1: Sir, there’s a problem.
TheRealMe, pondering: Well, then, maybe the Alexander the Great, or the…
Zoe-clone1: No, Sir, I meant…
* It is at that time that TheRealMe notices the fallen form of the EvilWeirdGirl. *
TheRealMe: Oh, NO!
* TheRealMe runs over. *
TheRealMe: PsychicRiver, is this our WeirdGirl or the evil one?
PsychicRiver, concentrating: I can feel the presence of ThatWeirdGirl nearby. This must be the other one.
TheRealMe: Whew! That’s a relief! Ebo Golem, come here to help me. Bring a mop.
Zoe-clone1: Actually, Sir, that isn’t the problem that I was talking about.
* TheRealMe looks up from the EvilWeirdGirl, to see two pairs of Zoe-clones staring at each another. *
All four Zoe-clones say at once: What now, Sir?
Suddenly, Nugget the meteor troll excitedly runs up and bowls over TheRealMe, then bends down to lick his face.
The Real Me, First Officer of the Sereni-Tree
(The Real Me cannot currently receive messages from this site; he is not ignoring you. But he CAN receive e-mail at realme@pcibroadband.net.)
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*** THE REAL ME'S TIME MOVES FORWARD TO THIS UNFORGETTABLE MOMENT ***
Quote:
Originally posted by PsychicRiver:
*PR wanders arond the hanger bay, and then hears a doorbell.*
Oh, *Wanders over to the airlock, then keys the button to permit entry*
*Moments later, the door opens, and seven characters wonder aboard. One is another Mal-Clone, and the others...well they could only really be described as the Malcolmettes...*
Um, hi?
*They all aimlessly wander around the bay spouting Mal quotes.*
TheRealMe is stunned at the sight and forgets about the extra Zoes, the fate of EvilWeirdGirl, the meteor troll's affections, and the fact that Emma may still be sleeping on his foot.
"Everyone wants a pifflepony, deep down." — Piffle101
The Real Me, First Officer of the Sereni-Tree
(The Real Me cannot currently receive messages from this site; he is not ignoring you. But he CAN receive e-mail at realme@pcibroadband.net.)
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*** THE REAL ME'S TIME HAS CAUGHT UP TO "NOW" ***
Quote:
Originally posted by SimonWho:
*activates ship's intercom*
Hello? Testing, testing, 1, 2, 3. Now that I have your full attention, I have a question to ask.
I'm sorry, was that a little loud?
This is for my weaker half. I'm in the lounge. I have your friend and a very large gun.
Come alone. Come unarmed. Come ready to die.
* TheRealMe is startled into action. He pushes Nugget away and stands. *
EvilSimonWho! He has somebody! Go unarmed, huh?
* With purpose in his step, TheRealMe strides toward the hanger bay exit to the common room. As he moves he unlatches belts of weapons and ammo and drops them in his wake. A spam gun drops. Then a high-tech squirt gun. Then a Cozen-katana. From a pocket, he pulls out a small object that fits comfortably in his hand. *
* TheRealMe moves through the hatch and looks down into the common room from the upper balcony. *
Hmmm… nothing looks out of place.
* TheRealMe speaks quietly into the com-link in his hand: *
Computer, display coordinates of the origin point of the last ship-wide broadcast.
* TheRealMe stares intently at the device’s small screen. *
Hmmm… looks like he’s in the messhall / lounge.
* TheRealMe puts his com-link back in its pocket and takes the nearby elevator down to the floor of the common room. He quietly makes his way across the large common room, past the bar, past the video arcade and up to the entrance to the lounge. He peers through and sees that it is ThatWeirdGirl that EvilSimonWho has as a captive. TheRealMe takes one step into the room, careful to not block the door. He calls across the large room: *
EvilSimonWho! Sorry if I arrived before your target. But I have had quite enough of this! You will not endanger any member of this crew! Let me describe to you the best possible outcome that you can expect from these events: You will surrender your weapons and await imprisonment in the brig until such a time as we can get your counterpart to re-absorb you!
* TheRealMe stands there a moment, unarmed, with hands outstretched and clearly visible at his sides. *
If you wish to try my patience, I can think up a worse ending for you. MUCH worse! So, what will it be?
* TheRealMe realizes that normally he would be FAR more diplomatic. However, he has had an exceptionally rough day... *
The Real Me, First Officer of the Sereni-Tree
(The Real Me cannot currently receive messages from this site; he is not ignoring you. But he CAN receive e-mail at realme@pcibroadband.net.)
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Quote:
Originally posted by TheRealMe:
If you wish to try my patience, I can think up a worse ending for you. MUCH worse! So, what will it be?
There are two sets of loud 'clicks' and TRM and EvilSimonWho both snap their heads around at the sound. TWG doesn't need to look, because she already knows. Twin Statics have taken up positions in the room and have twin sets of revolvers levelled at EvilSimonWho.
DarkStatic: Now then, Doc...
Static: It would seem that we have you
DS: a bit outflanked. Just ONE of us is
Static: MORE than fast enough to drop you where you stand. . .and since I'm good enough to hit...
DS: A gnat's left wing at 100 meters, you know I can hit something larger and closer. . .
Static: like maybe. . .your knees. It's over, Doc. You're the last of the dark halves running free. Time to give up. Think about it. I'm willing to ugly you up just for indulging in kissy face with my signifigant other. . .how much tolerance do you think I'm gonna have for something like this?
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