SLICEANDDICE

I do not remember the sun. My life has been lead without it. I have no memories of trees with glistening sun-kissed leaves. No comforting glow to turn to. No rays a precious life. I have not known its warmth, glow, its presence, its light. I have not known of its life. I don’t remember the sun. I have no need of it. I have no need for its life, no need for light, so none of it is present or welcome in mine. It does not bathe me in glory, as it dos for others. It shuns away from me. The embrace of it I do not grace. It does not hold me well in the noon hour, or any. For me and I there is no sun. Darkness is my home. Cool, sweet, kind darkness. Where moonbeams bleach my skin and playful breezes tickle my nose. Where the world is but a whisper of its self and the whispers shake through the trees and hills without resistance. The stories all laid out for those know how can hear. Dew collecting on leaves flowers and eyelids, and mysteries and wonders all stand waiting to be found. And I have lived here alone. Oh there have been those who tried to join me, but Darkness is my kingdom, prison, and mine alone. Those who brought me here, and left me here, my mother, my father, pretend to be with me, to join me, but it is all a false mask. In truth they line in Light, and with it the Sun. They pass through, pass by, try, but they can not make their home in Darkness, with me. Not while the Sun still calls them, still loves, still opens its arms and embraces them while shunning me. I will not lie. I will tell you only the truth. I have craved the Sun in wonderment, for its mystery. But its bite and sting in my youth have driven me away and told me in no uncertain terms of it’s disgusting and hatred. It has told me to stay, stay away. So Darkness, my sweet friend, hold me tight, and I allow it to embrace me in its loving arms, to envelope me completely. And, Oh!, do I give into its sweet kisses when they are offered. And I have no loneliness for all the happiness I feel. I can not share my world, for none can join me with sacrifice. And without companion ship Darkness becomes my isolation. It has left me alone. No moon blossoms for any but me. Only I speak to owls and foxes and the other beast of the night. And only I can love the sweet beauty that is the Dark. The stillness, the quite and the subtle life. But, Oh!, have I know loneliness and its pain. It has shattered my heart, pierced my soul, ripped open its holes to disease, and left me broken. I have craved affection, companionship, until my body has screamed in despair. Again and again, until my tears stung my eyes at the darkest hour, only to wiped away by the only one who cares for me, my Dark. And maybe it was the Dark who called to me in the end. Where my loneliness and sadness usually laid one night there where friends to fill the void, to join me for once. There where companions to share my home and Kingdom with. To sit and lay with me, to travel by my side through the Dark, to experience it with me, finally I was not alone. And the showed me more, told me more and gave me more than I had ever had before. What beautiful creatures they were, that would be my lone companions. As small as the mushrooms beneath the aged trees and as tall as the trees themselves they stood. Beautiful all in their own subtle ways. Cloaked only in nature itself; leaves, flowers, fur and moss, Man and woman all, nothing human or modern about them. And I loved them so. Together my home became full of life and laughter. To the singing of the trees we danced, over hills and creeks we roamed. And never was I to face the cold alone. The faces always changed. Never did the same come two nights in a row. Never, save for two. Names where never exchanged, for they bore no importance, so their true names I have never known but they where my cons

SLICEANDDICE

First there were the headaches, the searing, burning and stabbing pain all through out my head. Crippling and making me weak, but I kept it to myself. I hide my pain to keep my freedom, for my parents would have locked my up and watched with bided breath if I showed any sign of illness. So great was their fear of losing me. And trapped in box with only candle light to comfort me was too terrifying to consider. So I forced a smile to run in my fields and hideaways in the sweet starlight forest above. And I got to be with Them. They began to visit me more frequently and our love trust only grew. Even when the sky began to pale around the edges they where with me, even when I had to say good-bye I could feel them with me. Soon though, the blinding headaches turned to nausea, and hiding became increasingly difficult, but I still did. I ate very little to fight the nausea and sickness and without fail I began to slowly loss weight. With that my parents began to allow the slightest worry cross their mind but thought it was simple teen rebellion, using my body to hurt them. The Doctors just told me to eat more, that it was silly to ‘starve’ myself, thinking the Dark had made me angry. No one saw that it was my body rebelling against me. What pained me the most where their repercussions. As my body turned against me I could not always make it out into the Dark, and that sadden me the most. But soon it did not matter, because soon They began to visit me even in my home. They came even in the punishment of day. Even when the waves of nausea crippled me to my bed I had some one to hold me, They laid with me. And when I was antsy and unable to sleep in the Sun shadow they danced with me, read with me and simple whispered with me through the heat of the day. Often I didn’t even need to call for them, when pain hit me they where there to hold my hand when I needed it. When I could make it out I was more subdued, unable to race in the night as I use to. The nausea kept me from dancing and frolicking with weakness and kept me from playing like a child with hunger. But still the Dark offered me so much. In the quiet stillness I could hear the whispers of life past and prayers weeping for their creator. In the twinkle of the starlight above I could watch my companions dance in passion and see how nature danced with them. And as the night expanded around us U could hear the softest sound of the purest part of my friends. It is truly amazing how much strength you find you possess in the light of sickness. And it is amazing how well you can hide your weakness and sickness when no on one is truly looking. And it is scary how easily one can lie to themselves about the truth. Yes, my sickness progressed. From headaches and nausea came the weakness and insomnia, for all the sickness sleep invaded me. Then came shakes and chills. So quickly did my down fall come, before long I could not walk. And I could hide no more. The Doctors poked and prodded, my Parents fritted and cried, but they could find nothing wrong. For all the tests and questions, there was nothing for them to find. Desperation flooded their actions and words. They became increasingly invasive. For awhile after then I was condemned to live in the hospital. With nurses forgetting more than once about the lights and the sun pounded mockingly on the windows all sending me into unknown pain. Where medicine was forced in me to make me sleep or to try to heal me and tests where run one after the other and no food could encourage me to eat. And I was alone. The hospital was my hell. Even in the haze of drugs though I learned I wasn’t alone. On the edge on my consciousness I felt Them. In the day I would catch o glimpse of them in the halls, behind the nurses, hiding in the shadows, form the sight of anyone but me. At nigh She or He might visi

KINETIC

My first blog: So, I am writing my own universe, holy crap this is difficult. I have a great deal of respect for those that write fanfics here and have redoubled that respect with the project I am currently on. I have a job that is long stretches of boredom punctuated by moments of panic. I spend that time here or in my other fandoms. Lately a creative wild hair/hare has crawled twix my nethers. That is what is calling me to create my universe. I have had this idea floating around in the dark emptiness I call my head for at least 15 years. It revolves around shape shifting, totems, and the possibility that all the monsters we grew up fearing are not only real and regulated; but all related. Much like JKR, Joss, and RO'B though probably not nearly as good, I will hopefully get this thing done in the next few months then go shopping for a literary agent. Wish me luck

MSB

They always say children are our future... I am beginning to think we might be doomed. I really do love my students and I see some who are working and trying, but for the most part, they aren't. They will do as little as possible and just scrape by. I am not just talking about the students I work with, but all over. The work ethic seems to have gone in favor of scams, rudeness, lying, self absorption, and a complete lack of interest in anything that isn't entertainment related. I could go on and on and blame loads of different groups, but what it comes down to is we, as a society, are losing what matters. We work so hard to offend none and micro manage all that we have driven all creativity, ambition, and work ethic out in favor of internet celebrity and getting by with as little work as you can... Hmm sounds like I am bitter, but really I am just sad. I don't think there's much of a future out there. I see some exceptions ( like the teenagers on this board) but as a whole I don't think much of my generation's parenting abilities... we're raising lazy, selfish, brats!

CRISSAFURY

mortals see mortals do but i will be the one that puts the faer in you you may see me you may not but the shadows will leave a sigh of me beening there :evil: