N.B. rated over 15 for language and implyed sexual references... although i knew 'bout this crap when i was 11, so dont hold too much by that.

*** additional note, the game featured in this fic is real. and very funny when played with drunk people. contacxt me or belona if you take a fancy to knowing how to play it! ***

***

Kaylee was losing at solitare. Repeatedly. And she wasn’t very happy about it.

“Gorrammit!” she yelled, tossing the pack across the dining room table. The cards slid out, some flying off the edge. “Stupid game anyhow.”

There was a deep laugh behind her and Jayne appeared carrying a big bottle of her engine fermented cider and two glasses. “Well then, li’l Kaylee, wanna learn a fun game?”

“Does it involve strippin’?”

“Hey, I never said that!” Jayne slapped the glasses down, looking hurt, dumped the bottle of soft amber liquid in the middle of the table and set about picking up the escaped cards.

Kaylee giggled, watching the big mercenary scrabbling around on his hands and knees. “You sure thought it though, din’t ya?”

He glared at her. “Fine, I’ll teach ya the less nekkid version. But it’ll be way less fun.”

“I’ll play!” River dashed through from the bridge at high speed, bare feet making no sound on the grating. She twirled mid-dash, grabbing three glasses from the sideboard. Smiling in excitement, she plonked them beside Kaylee and Jayne’s.

“Uh, how much d’ya plan on drinkin’, moonbrain?” asked Jayne, eyeing the extra tumblers.

River rolled her eyes, looking at him as though he were a particularly dim toddler. “Not for me, silly. Five players, five glasses. Duh. Even your underdeveloped intellect can surely grasp that.”

“Why you-”

“What’s going on?” Zoë appeared in the doorway with Simon, taking in the scene at a glance. “Don’t tell me, River’s newly found wit strikes again.”

“River…” Simon began, looking slightly exasperated. Ever since Miranda, River had been quipping with a sense of humour to rival the captain’s.

River grinned at them. “Jayne gonna teach us card gam