Blue Sun Room FICTION - GENERAL

The Return Home - Part 8

Sunday, June 15, 2008

Serenity heads for Hera and Mal and Zoe's past catches up with them. Meanwhile Shepherd Book arrives on Ariel and prepares for his mission.

CATEGORY: FICTION    TIMES READ: 3694    RATING: 9.0 (PG)    SERIES: FIREFLY

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The Return Home – Part 8

Serenity sat in a dry river bed on Oxbridge moon in the outer edges of the Persephone system, a necessary stop to make repairs to the ship due to damage caused in a battle with two Alliance gunships a few hours earlier. After a quick lunch Kaylee got to work patching holes and making the ship air tight again, at least for the time being. As she hung over the side of Inara’s shuttle in a harness, with soldering metal and torch in hand, Kaylee knew it was only a rough patch job and that they would have to land on Hera and go into that shipyard Badger said was there, close by Serenity Valley. The shock his words produced was evident on the Capt’n and Zoe’s faces. Serenity Valley. The last battle.

Badger explained that a cousin of his had a shipyard nearby the battlefield. He had set up shop there years ago after the battle, scavenging metal and tank and high flyer parts from the battlefield, making a tidy profit and then was able to open his own ship repair yard. Mal made no decisions on whether they would go or not and left the table in a foul mood. Kaylee asked Jayne to help her with the repairs and the big merc was glad to get off the boat, and away from the questions he knew everyone except River had about Book’s letter.

They moved about the ship for hours, attached to EVA lines and harnesses, pounding out dents with mallets, pulling spent Alliance heavy slugs from the hull, soldering holes in the back and in Inara’s shuttle. Kaylee’s rad detector signaled that they were leaking rads somewhere from the tail end and she got the feeling that the full burn in atmo they executed to escape the Alliance gunships had caused the ship to overstress itself. There had to be a small hairline crack in the bibulous end but Kaylee couldn’t see, didn’t have the equipment to detect it or repair it and knew it had to be fixed before it caused bigger problems. She patched all the holes she could find in Inara’s shuttle and then Jayne pulled her up to the top of the shuttle and they climbed to the

Comments
Sunday, 15 June 2008 11:59
I loved this, especially Mal and Zoe revisiting Serenity Valley and all the memories and ghosts that stirred up. Wasn't sure at first that it was right that Inara was there to but it worked just fine. I am so glad those two are finally working it out between them. One little nit pick, twice you use the word arraign in the wrong context. First Kaylee using arraignment instead of arrangement then again in the last paragraph when Book is thinking about what he has to do - 'Now everything was arraigned'. Again that should be arranged. Arraign means 'to call to account, to put on trial'. It is not a fancy alternative to arrangement. Hope that helps. I was very worried though about Mal and Zoe talking to the man at Serenity Valley in case he recognised either one of them as Browncoat war veterans and turned them in but I got the feeling he would have sympathised with them. Then again when Jayne returned to the ship having paid for his fun in the stolen jewellery, not sure how safe that was. And lastly offloading the guns with Badger especially the really old and valuable one that Jayne had his eyes on. I'm thinking of things that can trace the crew to those things and it makes me nervous though like Mal I am powerful glad those guns are off his boat. Excellent story, can't wait for more! Ali D :~)
You can't take the sky from me
Sunday, 15 June 2008 12:22
Thanks for the heads up on the misused words. They creep in sometimes. I'm an English teacher and should know better, but no matter how many times I read it and go over it I miss something. That one is even on my list of common errors. Question about your comments: Why would a tour guide turn in Browncoat veterans? I mean, the war is over, it's a tourist site. American war vets visit Vietnam and have no trouble. And Zoe and Mal did identify themselves as Browncoats. Anyways, off to Miranda and more exciting stuff to come!
Sunday, 15 June 2008 17:09
Getting caught up, gosh... this one made me tear-up, with Mal and Zoë returning to the Valley.

And, I think Mal wants to tell Inara a lot of things, she's that important. He just can't find the words, but, he needs to do that because that is part of the healing, so, I like this resolution between them.
Monday, 16 June 2008 08:45
the 'easy' paced way you write hides a wealth of detail - am enjoying this very much.
Monday, 16 June 2008 13:19
I'm glad Mal told Inara about the war...she does have a way of making him feel better, even if it's just him talking - makes Mal more ready to start a new life as a rancher with her too!

Also like the little backstory of Book... gee, do I want Cutter dead!

Keep flying ;)
Wednesday, 18 June 2008 02:33
You really know how to write a very nasty villain. Sounds like Mal is laying one demon to rest only to meet another.

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