Blue Sun Room FICTION - ADVENTURE

Bad Business - Part Six

Friday, June 6, 2003

What do you do when you run out of options?

CATEGORY: FICTION    TIMES READ: 3162    RATING: 9.0 (NC17)    SERIES: FIREFLY

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"Bad Business"

Annie M (trekgirl@blueyonder.co.uk)

Part: 6/6

See part one for disclaimers and summary

/\~/

Several seconds after Captain Reynolds had departed, Captain Santos stepped out of the shadows to put a hand on Choi's shoulder.

"You handled that very well, Commander; I'm impressed," he said.

"Just following orders, sir," Choi muttered unhappily.

Santos said mildly, "Orders you weren't willing to entertain twenty-four hours ago."

"I took your advice, and considered my options."

Santos smiled ruefully. "Accepting the truth can sometimes be difficult, Commander Choi, but I'm sure you can see now, that this is for the greater good."

"Yes, sir," Choi replied bleakly.

"Don't ever doubt what we stand for, Commander, and don't ever forget the sacrifices the Alliance have made to get to this point. Your wife and children will sleep better if you bear that in mind."

Choi turned to face Santos. "We can't go on telling everyone that Reavers don't exist, sir; that they're some sort of savage nightmare that colonists and spacers have made up--"

"That's exactly what we'll keep doing," the Hessen's captain interjected. "Out here on the rim; among the core planets; that's exactly what we'll keep telling them."

"But they were our own men! Surely we have a responsibility to put a stop to them? We have to face the truth," Choi demanded.

Groaning, Santos replied, "And let everyone in the Core know that Alliance soldiers couldn't handle the ravages of war? That they went mad and are now terrorising colonists? That truth?"

Choi had no answer.

"You'll do what you've been instructed to do, Commander, and you'll go a lot further if you remember it."

"And Morfan?" Choi asked miserably.

"We'll blow the entire moon back to Earth-that-was if necessary, but nothing that isn't already off the ground is getting out of there now. Serenity's crew aren't a threat, and in time this episode, like so many others, will simply be another campfire story to scare your children with

Comments
ANONYMOUS
Saturday, 07 June 2003 01:16
BC

I figured the Alliance will blow the moon up. Typical for governments.
It's hard to keep governments out of your life unless you live like a hermit but that's not Mal.
Saturday, 07 June 2003 04:40
Nice work.
ANONYMOUS
Saturday, 07 June 2003 16:27
Verrrrrrry nice. You got a great bead on all their voices, they all seemed to remain true to character. And an enjoyable story on top of it.
Sunday, 08 June 2003 04:52
Very nice job. A real story,with a real plot. I can definately see this as an episode. If this is your first story its a very accomplished job and you should definately write more. I thought you touch with Wash and Zoe very deft.
ANNIE M
Sunday, 08 June 2003 18:33
Thank you to all for their comments, they are appreciated.

And just to clarify, this is not my first attempt at fan fiction, just my first in the Fly universe.
Sunday, 08 June 2003 19:33
Excellent. I enjoyed the suspenseful parts (3-5) the most. Pirates, Reavers, the Alliance, oh my! The pacing was very good in those parts.

I think you did Mal's and Jayne's voices very well. Wash and Zoe too, except maybe the "Coming dear" exchange was a bit over the top. But the hot lovin', wow!

Very well done.
ANNIE M
Sunday, 08 June 2003 19:52
Thanks Sarahetc,

Glad you enjoyed it. ;-)

The "coming, dear" line was supposed to be tongue in cheek, but if you found it OTT, c'est la vie.

I couldn't resist putting it there. ;-)
ANONYMOUS
Thursday, 19 June 2003 21:58
Absolutely brilliant! I was hooked to every part of this story and loved the characterisations. All of them were spot on, the only thing I would have wished for was an interlude between Mal and Inara at the end, but hey, with a story this shiny you have already spoilt me. Keep Flying and thanks for a terrific piece of storytelling, Ali D :~)
ANONYMOUS
Saturday, 21 June 2003 19:02
Thank you, Ali D!

So glad you enjoyed it and commented--makes all the hard work worth while. ;-)

LJC
Tuesday, 08 July 2003 22:09
I know I've sent you this via email, but I love, love, love this story, and thought I should say so where folks could see me *grin.* You just nailed everybody's voices, especially Mal's. And I even forgive you for the lack of Simon/Kaylee scene at the end (heh).
ANNIE M
Tuesday, 08 July 2003 22:22
Snort!

Thanks again, LJC. There's nothing like reinforcing the love! ;-)

Hmm, for being such a great exponent of all things Firefly maybe I'll try my hand at a Simon/Kaylee snippet for you sometime.

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