Blue Sun Room FICTION - GENERAL

The Endgame Scenario - Hindsight

Friday, June 1, 2007

Everything always looks better in hindsight.

CATEGORY: FICTION    TIMES READ: 2809    RATING: 7.0 (PG)    SERIES: FIREFLY

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‘Is it dead?’ Mal asked. There was a scream, and four of the creatures ran through the debris. They looked pissed. The cigar man swore loud and long. Meanwhile, Mal made his way off the wall, down to Serenity, narrowly missing a tank. He watched as a flare fired into the sky, clearing the air of dust. The intercom screamed for people to evacuate. Ten seconds later, the wall erupted, and the Spectres came pouring in.

That was less than a month ago.

Since then, Mal had been drifting in space. Safest place to be, Jayne had reasoned. Spectres were rarely found on ships, preferring to concentrate on ground forces instead. It was a massacre, nothing less, but even that was naught compared to the orbital bombardment by EXCALIBUR, the Alliance’s shiny new toy. Harnessed energy from outside the universe, or something. Hell, Mal was no rocket scientist, no mechanic. He knew how his ship worked from touch, from knowing, not through a thousand and one degrees.

Mal sat back in his chair up on the bridge, and wondered how everything had come crashing down around him so fast. His crew just packed up and left. Well, most of them, anyway.

Zoë, surprisingly, was the first. As the months wore on after their little visit to Miranda, Zoë became quieter, rarely saying anything. When she did speak, she spoke in one-word sentences. Eventually, the day came that Zoë didn’t talk at all. For three whole weeks, not a word left her lips, until she told Mal she was leaving the ship, that she didn’t feel comfortable working, living in Serenity any more. He’d understood of course, but that didn’t take away from the pain of her departure. She kept in touch every couple of weeks. Weeks that turned into months. She’d been hired by a security firm, guns-for-hire, but legal-like. Mal imagined her as a bodyguard for some high-flying bureaucrat and his mistress. He hadn’t heard from her since the start of the war. Doubted he ever would.

The war itself hit with astoundingly little effect. They still did jobs,

Comments
Friday, 01 June 2007 04:45
Oh, Mal what have you done? This doesn't bode well for our captain, but the story intrigues. I'll be interested to read the next chapter.
Friday, 01 June 2007 11:03
You rattled this depressing scenario off with hardly a pause for breath. Not so much a story or a chapter of one as a summary. I could see Zoe leaving after Wash's death and Miranda but you never actually told that story, there were no conversations, nothing to bring to life the events you describe in a clipped gloss leaving me breathless at the pace of it and unsatisfied by the lack of depth in the content. Not sure what your intention is here, whether this glimpse of what could have been is the entirety of what you are writing or whether this is a backdrop to let us know what is coming up in a new story. I also think that Kaylee and Simon would have been much more sensitive about dropping the bombshell that they were leaving Serenity to start a family, knowing it would effectively ground the ship and leave the Captain and Jayne with no future in the Black. Even River only stayed for a short while. Ali D
You can't take the sky from me
Saturday, 02 June 2007 00:46
A tad bit on the thin side, but definitely some intriguing stuff here, BrainSpecialist. Like AMDOBELL, I had hoped that if you were gonna explore the slow collapse of Serenity's "family," that we would get more than a cursory explanation...but I am eager to see what else you come up with concerning this storyline;)

BEB

P.S. Mean this in all good humour...but I hope to Book's Special Hell you got reginaroadie's permission to use Shooter, even in passing;)
Monday, 13 August 2007 00:36
I'm actually glad you did the skimming thing. Gives you time to get into the rest of your story without useless exposition-as is so often the case on this site. A relatively logical sense of events and reactions (as opposed to others-Jayne/Kaylee-What the!) and a good summary.

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