Inara laughed when she felt Mal’s tongue teasing her earlobe and she rolled away, waiting for him to grab hold of her and pull her close. She could nearly taste his rugged, leather and gun oil scent in her mouth. Wiggling under the bed sheets, she waited for his touch, but woke up as her pillow knocked a trinket from her night stand. Sadly, she realized her dreams and opened her eyes to see her half-empty bed. Her very large, red-sheeted, half-empty bed. Practically her office. Her place of business. And while she enjoyed her work, she always imagined sharing this bed with Mal would bring something more than a pleasurable night. There were times between jobs when they would be relaxing to a celebratory dinner or walking about town, and he would talk to her. Real talk. Kind talk. Like a friend, or perhaps more. Those were the moments he truly saw her, and not just her profession. Those were the moments she cherished because he wasn’t seeing her as some helpless damsel in distress that he needed to rescue from a wicked life of prostitution. He saw her. And she could believe in those times that he treasured her, loved her, and wanted only her.

Inara couldn’t remember exactly when she fell in love with Mal. With Serenity, it had been love at first sight. She saw the comfort, the faithfulness, and the freedom in the ship. It had taken a bit of time before she realized that there was no difference between Serenity and Mal. Everything his ship was, it was because of him. His life was infused with Serenity. And there were times when she looked into his eyes and she swore she saw freedom. As if freedom were something physical that could be captured in a look. And she reveled in his presence.

It was terrifying – her love for Serenity. There was nothing she feared more than love. Love that could make you blind to danger. Love that could open you up to hurt. Whenever she got too close to loving, she left. She thought she could have Serenity’s comfort and faithfulness and freedom without giving herself over to love. At