Author’s Note: If I thought Jayne’s character was hard to write, imagine what it was like to (attempt to) write River! She is portrayed so brilliantly on the show by Joss and his incredible writers that I can only hope to reach some of that greatness. So, if she’s a bit out-of-character, I apologize. I really have my doubts about this; in places it seems like I have her pinned down, but other times I think I write too sensibly. Well, there are a ton of experts on River’s personality out there, so let me know what you think of this humble endeavor. Any and all constructive criticism (if the fic "sucks ass" I’d prefer to know why) is appreciated. This fanfic includes SPOILERS for every episode so far (up through "Objects in Space") and also a small spoiler from the pilot, "Serenity" (just a mention of one of the battles in the war).

"That girl is . . ."

". . . not quite right."

". . . just a kid!"

". . . a precious commodity!"

"She understands. She doesn’t comprehend."

Too many thoughts inside – too many people, too many bodies

Pressed tightly together

Shoving, pushing against one another

Not enough space in the one, tiny room

That is her mind.

They’re like guests who won’t leave; they come inside without ringing the doorbell and won’t go away when she asks, orders, pleads . . . begs. They don’t hear her; their minds are filled with the sounds of their own voices and their own sufferings.

They think no one else can hear, but she can. She tries to cover her ears, tries to block out the overwhelming tide of emotions, but they seep through her ears, like warm, sticky blood.

"She feels everything."

They’re crushed together, grinding, flinching, searching desperately for a way out. Anger flares, and they wrestle for dominance, scraping and scratching, bodies grappling until they trample each other to the floor under the fury of their own boots.

Maybe they’re gone; maybe sh