LEEDAVIDT'S BLOG
brownquotes "ariel"
Tuesday, January 13, 2009 3:48 PM
Ariel[The crew talks about their upcoming visit to core planet Ariel while they eat.]
Wash: Big stop just to renew your license to Companion. Can I use "Companion" as a verb?
. . .
[Jayne hocks some spit to help sharpen his knife.]
Simon: Could you not do that while we're… ever?
[Jayne spits again]
Wash: So, two days in a hospital? That's awful! Don't you just hate doctors?
Simon: Hey!
[Unobserved by anyone, River pulls a huge carving knife out of the kitchen rack.]
Wash: I mean, present company excluded.
Jayne: Let's not be excludin' people. [grins] That'd be rude.
[Suddenly, River slashes Jayne in the chest.]
. . .
River: He looks better in red.
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[Coached by Simon, the crew prepares to impersonate emergency medical technicians.]
Mal: Patients were cynical, and not responding, and we couldn't bring 'em back.
Simon: They were cyanotic…
Mal: They were cyanotic…
Simon: … and not responsive…
Mal: … not responded— responsive…
Simon: … and we were unable to…
Zoe: Res—
Mal: Resuscitate them!
. . .
Simon: Which methods did you use?
Zoe: We— we tried pulmonary stimulators, and— and cardiac… we…
Simon: Infusers.
Zoe: Infusers!
. . .
Simon: What about cortical electrodes?
Jayne: Oh! [long pause] We forget 'em.
Simon: Let's try that again.
. . .
Mal: Pupils were fixed and dilapitated—
Simon: Dilated.
Mal: Dilated. Dilated! Ching-wah TSAO duh liou mahng! Shiny.
. . .
Jayne: Unable to get a neural…
Simon: Response.
Jayne: Response! Hell, I don't know. If I wanted schooling, I'd-a gone to school.
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[The newly-minted "ambulance" opens, and the three faux EMTs emerge.]
Simon: If I didn't know better, I'd say you're ready to save some lives!
Mal: Now all we need are a couple o' patients.
Simon: Corpses, actually. For this to work, River and I will have to be dead.
Jayne: Huh. I'm starting to like this plan.
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[Mal worries about Jayne's commitment to the comatose Simon and River.]
Mal: Look, you got a little stabbed the other day. That's bound to make anyone a mite ornery.
. . .
Jayne: The doc did good, comin' up with that job. Don't mean I like 'im any better. Nothing buys bygones quicker than cash. Maybe I'll give him a tattoo while he's out.
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[The faux EMTs wheel in their body containers, ready to do their spiel to get them to the morgue.]
Emergency Nurse: What do you got?
Mal: Got a couple DOAs. By the time we got there—
Emergency Nurse: Take them down to the morgue.
[Mal looks at his stunned team. Zoe begins to wheel her container in, but Jayne just stands there.]
Jayne: We applied the cortical electrodes, but we were unable to get a neural reaction from either patient!
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[A doctor is hassling "EMT" Mal for his insubordination.]
Doctor: You must be new. Don't get comfortable. Your type doesn't last long here. When your supervisor hears about the rude and disresp— AGHHH!
[He collapses. Behind him, Zoe lowers defibrillator paddles.]
Zoe: Clear.
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[On the diagnostic table, River screams.]
River: No! No! No. They come out of the black. They come when you call.
Simon: River, it's okay— it's, it's over. We're leaving.
[River looks straight at Jayne.]
River: Your toes are in the sand.
Jayne: And your head's up your—
Simon: Hey! Back off.
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[Mal and Zoe wheel out the medicine-laden containers.]
Wash: How much did we get?
Mal: Enough to keep us flying.
Zoe: Can we fly somewhere with a beach?
Wash: Maybe a naked beach?
[Wa
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