Happiness

Friday, October 12, 2007 5:56 PM

I'm not one of those people who needs to be in a relationship to be okay. But it would be foolish of me to say it doesn't make me happy to kiss and cuddle and be attracted and attractive. There's something about seeing yourself through someone else's eyes, someone who you think is wonderful, who's telling you you're beautiful inside and out. All those irritating flaws don't seem as important anymore. You feel like a better person. You're making someone smile and you smile more. It's an incredible feeling.
So right now... right now I'm just happy. And calm. Happier and calmer than I've been for a long time. There's no demands or unsurety, just feeling good.
There's distance. I'm wary of devoting myself overseas again; I know everyone understands that. But regardless of that, I'm putting myself out there to say that I am happy, life is good, a lot of stress has been lifted, and my honeybear means so very much to me. Fate has been in equal measures cruel and kind, really, but kindness and joy always outweighs anything else, I think. It's just finding it that's the trick.
The last few months have been quite a learning experience for me. And a rollercoaster. I was so upset so much of the time, and everything seemed to crumble, and then... Then all that ugly dust settled and I saw something beautiful.
I never expected things to work out this way, but I'm glad. Wherever it ultimately goes, I'm glad.

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