Title of my Life

Wednesday, May 23, 2007 7:47 PM

I wish my life was a movie, not in the conventional way, that there would be a plot (at least) but more in the way that it would stand for something. The title of it would be something like: We're lost, but we're making good time. Of course it's a famous quote and after going through the fan I'd probably change it I'm lost, but making good time, because I'm conceited that way and the movie is supposed to be about me, but then I'd change it back after figuring that perhaps the title isn't supposed to relate to just my mixed up teenage life, but the fact that the world in general seems to have no idea where the fuck they're going, just that they're gonna get there. It would not be a very good movie, it wouldn't have (conventional *wink*) adventure, but it would probably be deep and completely involved with my head. Which should be entertaining and meaningful enough :P. Everyone sees the sunrise different and thoughts are unquie. So you would hear mine, and the persons next to me, perhaps I'd hear it too and make a cynical remark about said person to my viewers....
It was so hard for me to choose what to write about because a lot of random things happened that I felt the need to explain.

I wish I could live in a place where it would rain for days. I'm so sick of this pussy Manitoba rain, where it drizzles for a while then disappears. I want thick sheets of rain with a consistancy that lasts for days! To such a point that when it finally stops I can go and meet the sun again.

Yesterday after working from 2pm-8pm on a excrutiating long history assignment, I was unable to form coherent sentences and decided I needed a break. So I donned my coat and orange crocks (with socks) and wandered the wet rainy street. I greeted the outdoors as if I were a dramatic writer, who had shut themselves away from the world in a dark dingy room with only the computer screen for light, living like this for weeks. I had pounded the keys confessing the secrets of the world, the flaws that could only be explained surrounded by a plot and the perfect character. You may wonder how I could relate the process of writing a genius novel to that of my history project, and I'll tell you. They're both complete bullshit. Sure the facts are there, we all know World War One happened and it's not its authenticy I'm calling bullshit (that's the Second war :P) its how I came across the facts and paraded them around my page like a pompus scholar who knows all there is to be said. After walking for a while I came across a large puddle and was faced with an inexplicable urge to jump into the very centre of it. Perhaps I needed to experience soggy socks, but I did. Jumped right in, then continued down the street jumping and kicking up water from any puddle that needed to be distrubed. Thoughts ran through my head like fire and I soon I was running my hand over the surface of cars parked on the road covered in rain drops. I thought about how much I loved the gray skies and how badly I would love to run away and never come back. Run to a place where the sky meets the ground and I wouldn't have to worry about money or food, I could just exist in the clouds. I jumped in another puddle as a car drove by. What did it matter anyways? *splash* What was all this worth? I thought of people and their expectations, and their silly thought processes. I thought as if I wasn't a person, I was something else watching them. That's usually how I think, leave myself out, like this life doesn't count me. I don't think it does too horribly, reality has always gotten me down. I had no where else to go and eventually arrived back at my house, my history project looming menacingly in front of me, like that of Frankenstien's monster. I layed down in the middle of driveway and wished the drizzle would become something much more substantial than what had already slicked my bangs to my forehead. I wished to be swallowed by the sky. Presently I was interupted by my (seemingly dramatic) moment by a neighbour -"Meghan, are you alright?" I replied-" Yes, I'm just taking a break from my hi

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