My Visit to the Grindhouse

Wednesday, April 11, 2007 6:16 PM

Doing a review for a movie like Grindhouse is tricky business. Not only is it two different films by two different (but equally competent) directors, but it's also a complete movie-going experience. So I'm going to go ahead and make my broad generalization first. Here goes... Grindhouse is the most balls-out, audaciously kickass movie experience you'll ever see in a multiplex. How's that?

With Grindhouse, it seems like Robert Rodriguez and Quentin Tarantino are offering up conflicting theses on what a Grindhouse movie is. Rodriguez's Planet Terror is a wacked-out zombie flick with every zombie trope thrown in and ratcheted up to full-9. The result is more of a parody of what the Grindhouse used to stand for. Tarantino flat out delivers a bona fide Grindhouse flick with Death Proof. His is very much in the vein of Duel and Death Race 2000.

To start off, let's look at Robert Rodriguez's Planet Terror, the first of the Grindhouse double feature. As stated before, Planet Terror is a zombie film of the highest order. Every zombie film ever made holds some kind of influence over Planet Terror. Night of the Living Dead, Return of the Living Dead, Dead Alive, Zombie Flesh Eaters, and a hundred flicks even I'm probably not aware of, they're all represented here. Planet Terror follows the formula to a T. But what makes this film stand out is everything that's blown completely out of proportion. Dozens of protagonists, equally numerous villians, hundreds upon hundreds of zombies, needless explosions at every turn, and all that's before mentioning El Wray (Freddy Rodriguez) and Cherry Darling (Rose McGowan), two of the coolest characters ever seen in a zombie flick.

It's clear that the majority of Grindhouse's budget went to Planet Terror. Pyrotechnics, elaborate makeup and gore effects, and an enormous cast of B-list mainstays. And Rodriguez adds all those flourishes to make the film seem 'authentic'. Burning the film stock, scratching the film, the missing reel (which is the film's single greatest joke), this is the spectacle that the promotions are pushing, and it's totally worth it. If Planet Terror had been its own film, your money would still be well spent. I did, however, get the feeling that people were taking the film seriously, and that's not the way to truly enjoy Planet Terror. This is meant as a comedy, and it's some of the most sadistic humor you'll ever laugh at. If you don't laugh at a helicopter taking out a crop of zombies, what DO you laugh at?

Then there's the intermission. Three fake trailers, two of which I really enjoyed. Rob Zombie's "Werewolf Women of the S.S."? Greatest celebrity cameo ever. Edgar Wright's "Don't"? Greatest worst idea ever. Eli Roth's "Thanksgiving"? I get that it was a goof on Halloween, but that doesn't make it good. It actually kinda sucked. Also, at the beginning of the film, Rodriguez's "Machete" trailer just rocks. It's silly, violent, and made completely of awesome. Danny Trejo ought to star in movies like "Machete".

Next come's Quentin Tarantino's Death Proof. I'm going to go ahead and say that I get what Tarantino's doing, I dig it, I appreciate it, but he set out to make a piece of crap, and he succeeded. Death Proof is a total Grindhouse film; it's got a cool hook, a good script, and a well placed cast. But it's intentionally disjointed, wildly uneven, and bizarrely repetitive. And even though Tarantino did all of this on purpose, think about what that means. He made a bad movie on purpose. Planet Terror is at least making fun of bad movies. Death Proof is an actual bad movie.

But having said that, Tarantino does pull of a lot of really awesome tricks in Death Proof. The movie is basically split into two equal halves. The first half builds Stuntman Mike (Kurt Russell) and his penchant for murdering girls with his "100% death proof" car. And the crash that ends this first half is a behemoth to watch unfold. The second half of the film turns the tables on Mike when he sets his sights on another group of girls who aren'

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