I feel so cheap and *sullied*...

Monday, October 10, 2005 7:43 AM

But oh, so very goooooooooood.

So, I went to the shops to buy some milk and bread and pick up the insulin no one in the world seems to have... anyway...

I passed by one of those mid center "massage" places that give neck massages for, like, $5 and I thought 'why the hell not'? I mean, I've gotta go into hospital tomorrow and rearrange my whole life, so why not something special for me right now?

So I sit down and he starts and, wow, my shoulders are real tense (like I didn't *know*?) and he starts away and convinces me to get the shoulders and neck massage for a little extra.

One of those places which doesn't have a *degree* listed anywhere and you can tell by the stances these guys are holding that they have no idea about proper posture and are going to kill themselves if they continue like this much longer, and none of the moves this guy was making was even remotely familiar and I doubt on the approved Australian Massage Association list...

But, oohhhhhhhh, it felt so good.

And, yes, I know that when I get my fiance up on the massage table and work on the kinks in his body, I can always turn it around and get him to work on me... but sometimes, I mean, we all know it, sometimes you just need someone who knows what they're doing.

And, as I sat there watching this other guy work on a man lying on a massage table, I got the strangest urge to just start giving them tips. Like, for instance, get a table with *adjustable* heights so that this poor guy doesn't have to double himself over to reach the body on the table and... oh jesus... is he *actually* kneeling on one knee to bend down to reach the man's arms? If you balance yourself properly, then you wouldn't be reaching back to rub away the ache in your kidneys, 'cause there'd be none... and hey, where you have 'foot massage' listed, maybe it should be 'reflexology' and, you know, do you have anyone that does hand and auricular reflexology? I'm available you know...

But I didn't actually say anything and just sat there and TOOK IT ALL as he pounded mercilessly at my stubborn, stubborn, fascia frozen flesh.

Mmmmmmmmm.

Don't tell my fiance, ok?

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